Extreme Procrastinator.
You thrive under pressure, especially when you have two fleeting hours until those dinner plans you just made the reservation for. That's enough time to find a satin velvet dress, knee high boots, a velvet choker, and a vintage leather handbag, right? While most would utter in panic, you do this sh*t for a living. A hasty one-to-two hour shopping spree, plus one hour of getting ready, is a success, always.
Carbs, Carbs, Carbs.
2017 is upon us. You are determined to drop those flabby arms and stomach in the new year. Before then, you have just 24 hours to devour every calorie-based item in sight. That's right, the seven layer brownie sundae on the menu will be indulged, and you will enjoy it. Hurry fast, because by noon the next day, carrots and crackers will devastatingly be your new go-to. That is, until your diet is cut short due to a withdrawal of succulent dinners and desserts. Will-power, people.
Booze and chill.
What other way to bring in the new year than belligerently chug an entire 30-case of coors light with friends in a high school acquaintances basement? Nothing sounds quite more alarming than a bunch of 20-somethings frolicking around a house as if they are back in a grimy and unsanitary fraternity house. Hey, at least you and your wallet will be satisfied in the morning.
Nightlife clubs/bars.
What does New Years Eve and the Big Apple have in common? A sh*t ton of celebration and regret. Going out clubbing is a big price to pay for an evening that reminds you why you're spending your week's worth paycheck in the first place. One, you overlook the past achievements you have not made this year, and would rather drown out your sorrow with sweaty strangers and a massive hangover in the morning. Furthermore, your love life is in despair and the desperation for a hook-up is in full gear. Don't worry about blacking out, though. You'll have a documented 100-second snapchat story you will puzzle back together the following day.
Your bed.
Forget champagne showers and one-night stands. All you need are dim lights, a tub of Ben and Jerry's Half Baked Ice cream, two melatonin, and a live HD viewing of New Year's Rockin' Eve with Ryan Seacrest, and you have yourself one rowdy night.
