It is not a choice. People do not choose to have a mental illness, and whenever I hear someone say otherwise, a piece of me breaks on the inside. Just because you are not going through something that someone else is experiencing does not mean it does not exist: that is called ignorance. They are not looking for attention; they are looking to escape whatever is destroying them. The truth is, its hard for someone to fully understand depression if they do not have it. But just because you aren’t going through it does not make it hard to be compassionate and have empathy.
Look at it this way, if you break your arm, have the flu, or get pink eye, you go to the doctor and get treated. No one questions you or says you are weak and lazy for getting help because you are sick. Your value doesn’t deteriorate and you are not scared to tell anyone that you are sick. So why is there so much fear and judgment when it comes towards mental health? It is time to start talking more about mental health and to break the stigma. Here are some of the things that you don’t see if you aren’t suffering from this illness:
1. The shame and embarrassment that comes with having depression and anxiety.
2. People don’t look depressed, it’s a mental illness not a facial expression.
3. People around you are suffering in silence everyday and you can't tell who.
4. The feeling of loneliness even when surrounded by people that love you.
5. The feeling of emptiness taking over every part of your body while you lay there contemplating your worth and value.
6. What it feels like to be told to "get over it" or just to "cheer up".
7. How hard you are trying to get better, even if others don’t see progress.
8. The side effects of medication.
9. Wanting someone to ask you if you're okay, but knowing that you can't actually tell them what is wrong.
10. Being depressed feels like you are watching your life on a TV screen rather than actually being a part of it.
11. It’s not stress, it’s not a lack of sleep, and it’s not just a bad day.
12. Feeling like it’s your fault, even though mental illness is not a choice.
13. Feeling like a burden when you try to confide in someone with what is going on.
14. Not enough rest will fix how exhausted you feel.
15. How hard it is to get out of bed in the morning to get through a “normal” day.
16. The breakdowns you have when no one is watching.
17. The struggle to explain to people that the dark cloud doesn’t fully go away.
18. The effect it has on relationships, especially with people who don’t understand.
19. Being afraid to feel happy, because you are waiting for the bad day.
20. The fear of being rejected by those who you love because of the stigma that comes with depression.
21. How useless you feel, and like you aren’t deserving of anything.
22. Feeling like you aren't good enough, because you are being told you aren't trying hard enough to get better even though you're honestly giving it all you've got.
23. No matter how hard it may be on those around them, it is ALWAYS harder on the person who is suffering.
24. You feel like you are drowning in your thoughts and emotions.
25. The toughest battle you are fighting is against your own mind.
No matter how hard it gets, it will eventually get better. No matter how alone you feel, try your hardest to remember that you are loved. You are not a burden to those who truly care about you. You are beautiful, worthy, and deserving of life and all the happiness in the world. The best thing you can do for yourself is to get help. Mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of and it is okay to admit that you are not okay. It does not make you weak and it does not make you any less of a person. There is a light at the end of this dark tunnel, but it will take time and work for you to reach it.
