As summer approaches, I believe a lot of us New Englanders begin to take our location for granted. You see, living on the Northeast coast gives us the ability to not only experience the fiery depths of hell a.k.a. stepping barefoot onto pavement in August, but also the whistling tundra that is our obnoxiously long winter. However, as both of these scenarios are the extreme ends of our seasonal change, I think we should take the time to think about what in the actual heck we would do if summer did not exist for us.
First of all, there would be no trips to the beach. Well, I’m sure some crazy Polar Plunge people would dive in once in awhile instead of just nodding their head and dropping a donation when they’re asked like a normal person (sorry Dad, I’m still not getting in there), but we would not be able to feel the warm sand on our toes, the sun on our lemon juice soaked hair, or the smell of coconut sunscreen slathered all over our arms and legs. There would be no koozies in the sand, no melted sandwiches, and certainly no nighttime beach parties. What would we wear? What would we do all day and night? Our skin would be as pale as the computer screens we are so accustomed to staring at for hours on end.
As far as fashion goes, what would men do with all of their salmon, teal, and light purple shorts? I’m sure they could be donated to warmer climates, or maybe, we could make a nice community quilt out of them in remembrance of what used to be, which would also keep us warm during those cold, lonely nights. Ladies would have no use for sundresses, shorts, wedges, not even our beloved maxi dresses (no, you cannot wear a maxi dress in the winter unless you are on vacation). The same old dingy striped black sweater that you pull out of your closet each week with a sigh from November to April would have to be worn year round! Imagine that.
Oh, and the food. Don't even get me started on the food. Say goodbye to ice cream all together unless you’re eating in on the couch with the fireplace blasting while also under a heated blanket. Lobster rolls? Yeah, they’re a goner. And fair food? A nice greasy piece of fried dough or maybe even a giant pretzel? There would be no time for such things, unless of course you purchase them from the Pizza Hut on the corner of your local Target. New England’s main attraction is the food, never mind the tiny blue shorts with little whales on them.
I think all of this torture, the thought of not having a summer, is a scary and terrible thought that we should not continue to dwell on. However, it is important to appreciate your summer, and the ability you have to get to the beach even though it may only be one day a week. I can walk to the beach; it really doesn’t get any better than that. Think of the people who live in a constant state of rain, snow, or just cold air in general the next time you complain about a 50 degree day and tell yourself that it will be warm, you will sit on the beach with that drink in your hand, and guys will continue to put on those light purple shorts (whether we want them to or not). Appreciate the sunshine, it will not only make you feel better, but others will begin to do the same when they see you basking in it.
