Last year I was a freshman in college. And I, like everyone else, had expectations and ideas about what it was going to be like. However, I was wrong about a lot of these thoughts that I had and I honestly wish I had somebody to tell me differently. Here are some things that I wish I had known.
Hookup culture is real and it’s okay. I feel like there’s this attitude that some high schoolers, including me, have about the idea of hooking up in college. I didn’t get it at all first. I always wanted to be in a relationship with someone I actually cared for if I was going to do anything. That’s definitely not how it ends up at all. It’s likely that if you make out or do other things with someone and you’re not actually dating yet, then it’s a hookup. Your opinion of hookups might even change after that and you might decide that waiting around for a relationship isn’t what you want anymore. You may just want to have fun. Either way, it’s all fine. Even if you don’t engage in hookups then your opinion of them will probably change. There’s no need to judge others for hooking up in college, it’s fairly normal at this age.
Grades are important! This is the second major attitude that has to change. In high school, grades aren’t nearly as important as they are in college. In high school, your teachers are probably much more lenient with grades and will give you a bit of a curve so that you succeed. It also doesn’t take as much to pass. Even so, grades aren’t that important in the grand scheme of things in high school. However, in college you have to work hard at school. Professors will help you but you have to ask and you have to put in an effort. This goes for everything. You should be trying your best from the beginning, but even if you get bad grades, which all of us do sometimes, then you have to make an effort to make that grade get better. If you fail out of college, then you won’t get a job and won’t be able to make a living. I procrastinated way more than I should have last year. Some procrastination is okay, but too much of it will spiral out of control until it gets to a point of never doing work, which is bad.
Drama will occur. This is probably the biggest misconception I had about college. High school is full of drama, it’s inevitable. High schoolers for the most part are immature. Drama is just a natural aspect of high school and within groups of friends in high school and relationships and so on. As a senior, I was ready for the drama to be over with. There was still some drama but basically I was at the level where I couldn’t deal with the immaturity of it all anymore and I was ready to go to college because there wouldn’t be any. This was false. Some of the worst drama I dealt with had to do with my friend group in college. Stuff I never even had to deal with in high school. People were manipulative, two-faced, back-stabbing, untrustworthy. Basically all of the qualities that equal drama. Don’t assume that the friends you make in high school won’t be immature enough to engage in or cause drama, because they will. At least some will. I eventually found the drama free people and it made all the difference. This also brings up another point that you probably won’t stay friends with everyone you meet at orientation or at the beginning of the year. Your friend groups will change and shift and you’ll always be meeting new people, so be open to it.
These are the major things that I wish I had known before starting my freshman year. Remember that school matters, hookups will happen and that drama will occur. Don’t let any of it affect your happiness though. I definitely learned from these misconceptions for the better.
