No matter how old you are, where you're going or how long you've been with your significant other, long distance is hard. Everyone has a different relationship. Some people may be fortunate to have the best long-distance relationship, but others may not be as lucky.
I have been with my boyfriend, Kyle, for three years. Senior year of high school came around, and it was time to make our college decisions. I am currently attending Mississippi State University, while he is at Auburn University. I thought it was going to be the end of the world, but it turns out that we are better than ever. It's not a walk in the park; it takes time to adjust.
Now that the school year has come to a close, here is some advice that I wish I had known about long distance.
1. People are lying when they say it is easy.
By no means is long distance easy (unless you don't care about your significant other). The adjustment from seeing your best friend every day to barely seeing them at all is so hard. Everyone wants long distance to work, but it's no walk in the park.
2. The goodbyes never get easier.
The first goodbye is always the hardest. The goodbyes never get easier, though. After having an amazing visit, why would you want to leave? It's no fun having to hug and kiss them goodbye, not knowing how long it will be until you see them again.
3. It can feel weird.
After being with someone for so long, being apart can cause changes. Going away to college changes everybody. Some people mature, find new interests, make new friends, etc. Your significant other can change. Sometimes it feels weird after not being with them for so long. How do you act? When you see them, do you go straight in for the bear hug? Will your significant other care if you're affectionate in front of his/her new friends? Do I go straight for the kiss? What do you say when I see him/her? At first, it can be awkward.
4. Make the most of your time.
When you visit you significant other, make your time count. You drove all that way to see the person you love. Why would you just lay in bed all day? Go explore each other's college towns, go on dates, go see a movie, meet each other's friends, catch up on all of your favorite TV shows together. Don't just sit around. Your time with each other will go faster than you know it.
5. Time flies by.
Seriously, your time together moves fast. Your time apart moves even faster. In the blink of an eye, your semester will be almost over, and you'll be spending Christmas break together. Take it one semester at a time, or break to break, and it isn't that unbearable.
6. Sometimes you'll have breakdowns.
I repeat, it is not easy. You'll always miss your significant other. Sometimes you get homesick, and just want to be in their arms. You constantly wonder what they're doing and if they're safe. It's okay to have a breakdown once in a while; it simply means that you miss them.
7. Be accepting of your significant other's new friends.
Your boyfriend/girlfriend is not going to just live to go to school and visit you. New friends will be made. Be happy for your significant other and don't get jealous. Although it stinks when you're not the one in their Instagram posts or Snapchat stories, their new friends are their new family away from home. Be accepting, and don't make your boyfriend/girlfriend feel guilty about making new friends.
8. Sometimes texting doesn't cut it.
It is hard to go from talking and seeing each other every day to only texting, talking on the phone or FaceTiming. Frankly, texting does get old sometimes. Set aside time each week to talk on the phone or have a Skype date. It is also hard to be a full-time student, attend classes, club meetings and sporting events glued to your phone. College students are too busy to be texting all day every day. If you get too busy, instead of not texting your significant other back, tell them that you are busy at the time but you can't wait to talk on the phone with them later.
9. It's all about trust.
If you have trust issues or don't have a trustworthy significant other, long distance is not for you. You won't know every detail of your boyfriend's/girlfriend's day. You have to trust them and take their word for a lot of things. If anything, long distance helps you trust each other more.
10 .You must sacrifice.
With long distance relationships comes sacrifice. You have to sacrifice the time you could be spending together to grow as independent individuals apart from each other. You have to sacrifice the fun you could be having on the weekends with your friends at school to go visit your significant other. If you don't both make sacrifices, it will never work. Find a happy medium.
Long distance isn't easy, but it is worth it. If you love someone enough you will make it work.
