What NOT To say to Someone with Anxiety

First off, anxiety isn't easy to deal with. It's a constant downer on your mood and your emotions. From dealing with anxiety, I've heard anything and EVERYTHING when having a panic attack.

You will probably read this and think "This is so stupid. Anxiety isn't even that bad." and blah blah blah. But until you feel that tightness in your chest; the inability to take deep breaths; or the feeling that you're all alone in the world: Read this.

1. "Calm down."

Don't tell me to calm down. Don't tell me to calm down because I CANNOT calm down. It's not easy to CALM DOWN. The person who is having an anxiety attack won't hear you. They don't because they are too scared and worked up to listen to someone telling them to calm down. Quit it.

2. "This is no big deal. It won't even matter in a year."

Yes, I know that. Trust me, I know my phone completely breaking will not matter in a year. But in this moment it does.

When I hear someone tell me this, it registers to in my mind as "You're overreacting and you're broken." I'm not broken. I'm hurting and I need someone to be there instead of telling me i'm broken and that I need help.

3. "Things could be way worse."

Do you not think I know this? I do, trust me. But feeling as if the world is closing in on you and that you're all alone makes you feel like the current situation is the worst.

4. "Take deep breaths."

I'm trying. I am TRYING to stop hyperventilating and to stop the tightening in my chest. I would LOVE to stop freaking out over the smallest thing and breathe normally. Trust me, I'm trying to take deep breaths but it's definitely not the easiest.

5. "Be positive."

When you feel the tightness of your chest and your mood immediately drop to a -1, being positive is not what I'm trying to accomplish. I'm trying to feel okay; to feel wanted; to be supported. The anxiety may be caused by the smallest thing but to someone with anxiety, it could be the demon that's eating them up each and every day.

There's so many more things that people say to me that makes me want to slap them and say "YOU'RE NOT HELPING ME." I understand things could be worse; I understand that I need to take deep breaths. Just know I'm trying.

If you know someone that has anxiety, the best way to help them is to be there for them. Being their rock through a hard time is always the best medicine.

To everyone with anxiety: you're not alone.