What Really Happens When You’re 100 Percent Italian
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What Really Happens When You’re 100 Percent Italian

And no, we’re not all in the mafia.

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What Really Happens When You’re 100 Percent Italian
Bishop Kearney HS

As we all know, reality TV shows have done a great job at giving us Italians a bad name; thanks "Jersey Shore." But let's set the story straight, half of them weren’t even Italian. I promise that we aren’t all orange, have poofs, or act like animals. If you’re 100 percent Italian then you know none of that stuff is relatable, but there are a few things we can all attest to.

1. Your mom and dad are not your only parents.

When you’re 100 percent Italian your aunts and uncles act like extra sets of parents. They are there to support and encourage you, but it also means they were there to discipline you and tell you when you’re being stupid.


2. You never have to wonder what you're eating for dinner on Sunday.

You have a set menu for Sundays, which includes: pasta, sauce, meatballs, short ribs, and salad. The only decision? Penne or spaghetti?


3. It takes 30 minutes to introduce your new S.O. to everyone at family parties.

Your significant other better be ready to meet 30+ people at your family parties and that’s just immediate family. By the time every person shakes their hand, kisses them on both cheeks, and asks, “Are you Italian?” the party is almost over.


4. You learn from a young age the wooden spoon is the enemy.

You know when that thing comes out to run for your life. The only benefit is because you had to run so fast, your stamina and endurance has now increased.

5. You know where Arthur Avenue is.

If you’re 100 percent Italian and a resident of the tristate area, you know where this food mecca is. Arthur Avenue is one street in the Bronx lined with restaurants and shops. With all of the freshest imported cheese and cold cuts it's the closest you'll get to Italy around here.

6. Nonna always makes sure you're full to the point of a food coma.

You know when you go to Nonna’s you better be prepared for a five-course meal. Your plate is full to the brim and her cooking is so good you can’t help but eat it all. It’s okay if you don’t move from the table for a good 45 minutes after you eat.


7. Your cousins are your best friends.

You know you can’t live without these guys because they’re more like siblings. They were the first friends you had, really. I mean who else would understand when you mock Uncle Vinnie’s voice cause he sounds like Joe Pesci.

8. The first Italian words you understood and learned to speak were the bad ones.

You knew when you heard these to start running cause something else would come shortly after. See #4.

9. You've avoided eating at other people's houses.

No offense, but your Prego and Ragu doesn’t intrigue us. Especially when Mom makes her fresh sauce every year. So if you whip out a jar of either and we suddenly find a reason to leave, just know it’s not you, it’s us.

10. We are the most passionate and loving people you'll ever meet.

We’re extremely passionate, hence talking with our hands a lot. We fight hard, but at the end of the day we love harder. If we love you, you’re instantly in the family, and we want to make you as comfortable as possible. As a family we may fight, but we know that each other is all we have and that’s completely fine with us.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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