Love. Such a mysterious emotion. Until you really experience it for the first time, it is hard to identify what love is really like. There are a lot of feelings and emotions that manifest in ways very similar to love: lust, desire, even necessity. But love itself is a unique creature.
Realizing for the first time that you honestly do love someone in every sense of the term can be a little bit like a slap in the face. Not every tiny aspect of love is rosy and pleasant. In fact, love actually usually entails the grungy, unpleasant stuff almost as much as it conjures up the fairy tale romance.
Love is when the majority of your worries and concerns are for the other person; this is not necessarily fun, because sometimes you actually double the amount of time you spend stressing since half of your concerns are for him/her. Love is when you finally understand what your mom meant when she said she was mad at you because she loved you; it is terrible to be mad at someone literally just because you love them, but it does happen. And love is when you don't think hypothetically about the rest of your life anymore, because you just know that it will be spent with him/her by your side; this part of it is actually one of the amazing parts.
Although it may sound less than ideal, expending your energy to worry about someone else can actually be good for you, because it allows you time away from your own worries, and it can often put into perspective many personal stresses or concerns that are actually minimal and rather unimportant! It's truly beneficial to get out of the habit of stressing over your own life, because most things are out of your control; worrying about someone else is a great way to realize that! Plus, it's always nice to know that someone cares about the hard parts of your life, so being able to provide that for someone is not without its positives.
It is also a funny idea to think that you could be mad at someone because you love them. In general, most relationships are very clear cut: Either you really like someone or you really don't like them. If you like them, you do most things together and you agree on the majority of their opinions or characteristics. If you don't like them, then you stay away from them. So finding yourself not getting truly mad over something that you don't like about the person you love the most can be really hard! But when you realize that you are angry at them for something that endangers them (like not stopping all the way at a stop sign or using tobacco), you realize that you're actually only mad at them because you love them. Weirdest thing ever, but that's just another way that honest, plain love manifests itself.
On a lighter side of the complexity of love lies the fact that you just know you're going to be with the person for forever. All of a sudden, you stop visualizing your wedding with a faceless groom. You start formulating a picture of what your home and your kids will look like. You share your wedding Pinterest with someone other than your best girl friends. You feel safe and comfortable about your future, and you allow yourself to actually be excited about the next ten years of your life. It's a very startling feeling but a wonderful feeling, and it's just another aspect of what actual love is like.
There are a lot of unexpected feelings and experiences that come with being truly in love, but it's the most fulfilling experience you can ever have. There is nothing like sharing the most raw and hidden parts of yourself with someone who will do the same and never question it. Go ahead and be angry, very angry. Spend time worrying for someone. Plan your future. Share your time, your energy, and your honest self with them. I promise it'll be worth it -- I know firsthand.
