This isn't a jab at any of my old friends. This is a thank you. Thank you for being my best friend(s). Thank you for showing me the light at the end of the tunnel. Thank you for letting me go because without it, I wouldn't have been able to find my happiness.
A friend is something special, something valuable. A best friend is the person you rely on for everything. The person you went to knowing that they would be there no matter what. It takes time and trust to build a best friend. So when you have to start from scratch, it feels like it's you against the world.
When you first lose a friend, you're distraught. The person you relied on the most has suddenly left and you can't understand why or how. How did this happen? How in twenty-four hours, did you go from having someone that you did everything with, to having no one. It isn't easy.
It isn't easy to admit defeat, to want to lay down your sword and apologize for any and everything. It won't change the situation. So stop apologizing. All you can do is move on. Maybe, eventually, you'll talk to whoever you lost, but it won't be the same. You probably won't be able to talk about the same things you used to. It'll be surface level conversations, and that's OK. It'll hurt a little. It'll bring back a flood of amazing memories, but you'll be OK. I promise.
From what I've learned, you just have to pick up your things and move on. Sometimes, losing them is the best thing that could've happened to you. Because you slowly become closer with other people, healthier people. The people that want the absolute best for you. These are the people that matter. Not the ones who hurt and damaged you. The people who love you for you are the ones who you should give your all to.
"Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another." — Proverbs 27:17
To end this, find the people who sharpen you. The people who are going to use their power wisely to help build you up. The ones who won't use their power to try and hurt and destroy you. Be open to new people, because no one is random and everyone who walks into your life has a purpose. They're either meant to be there forever or to teach you a lesson. So it's up to you to realize which it'll be.
