Friendship is a weird thing. If you really think about it, friendship is probably one of the most widely complex ideas that we have in our day to day life. But why is being a friend so complex? Well it's because not everyone has the same definition as to what friendship should be. Most commonly, it is a two way even relationship. But to some, a friendship is not even and can be abused very easily. In this article I hope to open people's minds as to how to open up and create longer lasting friendships that are of better quality.
Don't get me wrong, I am by no means at all any kind of "perfect" friend that knows all about how to be the best friend out there in the world. But in my 19 years on this Earth, I have learned some valuable lessons about being a friend that could be useful to all people out there in this world.
First lesson: Friendship is weird.
It's never going to be always good, but it's never going to be always bad either. Friendship is one of the weirdest things a person can ever take part in outside of love. Essentially when you are picking out who you want to be friends with you just decide what people you enjoy spending time with and hope they feel the same way. It is impossible to ever truly understand what drew you and your friends together, but it is important that you acknowledge the weird closeness that ensues and embrace it.
Second lesson: Friendship is a two way street.
My mom always said that "(Insert name here) was like a one way road." She said that that person always wanted her way and was not a very good friend. I don't know why it took me this long to realize it but my mom was right. That person was never a very good friend to me because they did not put the same amount of effort into the friendship as I did. It was obvious that that person valued the friendship purely because of the attention that I gave to them, however once I was no longer able to give them the same amount of attention they dumped me as a friend completely and I have barely heard from them since.
Final lesson: Be yourself, and don't change for your friends.
Anyone who is trying to convince you to change is not worth the time and effort that it takes to be a friend. If someone wants to change you, they don't like the real you and are therefore not worthy of your friendship. NEVER let anyone convince you that you are not perfect the way that you are. If they don't like every part of you, they are not your friend.
Now, I'd like to thank all of the friends I've had throughout the years. Both the ones that have lasted the test of distance and time, and the ones that fell apart. Either way you played a hand in teaching me these lessons and making me a better friend to the people I am with now. Also, to the friends that left and came back, thank you for coming back. It means more to me than you know.
