Ineffable: (adj) too great, powerful, beautiful, etc., to be described or expressed.
This past week, I had the privilege of taking a trip to Yosemite National Park. Despite it being a meager two day trip, I took away far more than aching quads and calloused feet.
In gazing out upon the opulent and seemingly sentient fields of Yosemite, I felt a sense of wonder. In looking up at the splendor and magnificence of El Capitan, I felt overwhelmingly insignificant. In beholding the mystery and vastness of the lookout provided atop Nevada falls, I felt accomplished. With all of these emotions and feelings that welled up in me during my trek through transcendentalism, they all festered and percolated into one messianic something. That something is the ineffable. And though I cannot put a finger on the indescribable, I can at least point you in the direction to its discovery.
The pursuit of happiness is vain. Period. Don't take this as words of cynicism, because my intention could not be more contrary. Happiness is something that is effable, or able to be described. Happiness is a smile, a spring in your step or a reaction to the Cavaliers winning the NBA Finals. Happiness is getting an A on your midterm that you studied so meticulously for. Happiness is fleeting. It is provoked by scant, definable moments that are often short-lived. Happiness is often bogged down moments after the feeling arises - a sad truth that is experienced all too often.
About three weeks ago, my mother told me that we had an opportunity to go to Yosemite. My initial thought was "Of course it's in the middle of the week, there's no way I'll be able to get work off." But I did. In the moment I was granted the time off, I felt happy. I can tell you how I was feeling, what I was thinking and what all was going on surrounding that bout of happiness. What I can't explain to you is what feelings stuck with me after leaving Yosemite. I can spurt one word that at least points to the cloaked mystery that that is ineffability: joy.
Take a moment to think about it for yourself. What is the difference between joy and happiness? If they seem synonymous to you, you have either not experienced joy or you aren't playing along with my riddle. Here you have to think deeper than these words' denotative meanings, because Webster's Dictionary won't provide you the answer.
As I said earlier, I achieved a state of happiness in finding out I could attend the Yosemite trip. This happiness was caused by external factors. A fix in the same way that someone feigns for a drug. A fleeting high that lends to a cyclical routine from euphoria to craving. Its pursuit will always render one unsatiated.
Joy pulsed through me in Yosemite because I wandered into its majesty as an explorer trying to bask in the ineffable. I surrendered myself to the journey, finding peace in solidarity with my own thoughts that were sparked by no externalities. What I took away cannot be placed into words, but the impact is one that is surely indelible.
Oftentimes we get caught up in the earthly matters that do not concern our own well being, e.g. looking for happiness by the amount of likes your photo gets of you atop of Half Dome. Or acting a certain way based off of a conditioned mind that diverts our doings from what we so truly crave. Joy cannot be found through what the media, marketers or gurus list as the panacea to all unappealing emotions. It can only be found when you put aside the remedies that others claim will work and find out for yourself what truly brings joy to your life.
Then and only then will the ineffable present itself to you and make its existence enigmatically known. Then you will see the effability of happiness is like sand - constantly permeating through through the gaps in your hand to leave you reaching for more. Until you relinquish yourself from the bind of externalities, you will find an excruciating void.
