Relationships with our parents can be hard, challenging, heartbreaking, and seemingly impossible sometimes. But they can also be the best relationships in our lives. And for me, my relationship with my parents tends to stay on the latter part. It would be cliché to say they are two of the most important people in my life, but it would also be true. My mom is basically my best friend, but my dad is my rock. Sure, he makes fun of me sometimes when I sing or… well, mainly when I sing, but I know it’s all in good fun (even if it doesn’t feel that way at the time). But, for what will be twenty-one years now, my dad has always, always been there for me.
I ran cross country and track in junior high and high school and if he could make it to the meets, he was there. It could be raining, sleeting, snowing (purely freezing) and he’d be there, ringing the cheetah-customized cowbell, cheering on the sidelines, pushing me to go faster and give it all I’ve got. I remember the day I told him I wasn’t running track my junior year and the pain he felt. At the time, it didn’t make sense to me why he was so upset I had quit my 2013 track season. But as he explained to me, “I can’t cheer you on when you’re writing. I want to be able to physically cheer for you because you’re good. Don’t quit.” But I quit anyway. The joy was evident when I announced I would resume running for cross country my senior year. Running was something my dad and I shared: athleticism. He was an athlete in high school and so was I. He knew what it took to be a good—no, great—athlete and he always offered to take me to Sarver Field so I could practice running ladders and giving it everything I had. From time to time I wish I would have taken him up on his offer to train me further and actually give more than I had, but I didn’t.
I talk about sports because it was something my dad and I both had in common. Something he could cheer me on for and say, “That’s my girl.” Though if we’re trying to be accurate, it was more of, “Give it more cowbell, Mad!” I also distinctly remember our chest-bumps we’d do after every meet I finished. It’s actually something I miss now, not being able to cross the finish line and having my dad be proud of me for actually being out there and running.
Besides the sentimental memories of cross country and track, my dad has offered me wisdom, advice, and laughs throughout the many years and I know there are many more to come. But for now, I want to talk about what my dad doesn’t know.
He’s taught me how men should treat women and how husbands should treat their wives. “If he honks his horn, you’re not leaving the house. He better come to the door if he wants to take you out.” Chivalry isn’t dead even if knights aren’t battling for their country in chainmail and swords.
Sometimes you just have to keep your mouth shut… but also know when to stand up for yourself. I’m not very good at this, but my dad has shown this time and time again. Like many dads, he has a lot to deal with at work, but he knows when to press an issue and when to let it go. It’s something I need to work on, but he proves it can be done.
He’s taught me to work hard. It’s amazing to me all the work my dad has done for his family and those around him. He’s constantly working, whether it’s at work, home, the cabin, etc. He’s always working. It’s easy to see your dad sitting down and think, there are things that need to be done, why isn’t he doing them? But until you realize just how much he is doing throughout his day, you won’t understand why it’s probably the first break he’s had in a while to just sit down and relax (and check the occasional Fantasy score).
I remember my dad always working when I was a child and by saying this, I’m aware that it sounds like he was never around, but he was, actually (and still is). My dad has provided (and continues to provide) for my family time and time again and I am so grateful and thankful that I am blessed with a dad like him. Our relationship is not perfect, but it’s real and he’s the best.
What my dad doesn’t know is that he’ll always be inspiring me and pushing me to do what I don’t believe I’m capable of doing. What he doesn’t know is that even on our worst days, he’s still the most important person in my life (tied with my mom—legally bound to say that). What he doesn’t know is that I value his opinion the most because I know it’s an honest opinion and it’s his.
Even though it’s not Father’s Day, it’s still important to tell your dad what he means to you because he will never hear it enough. It’s November, Thanksgiving is coming up in a couple weeks, and we’re supposed to be consciously remembering what we’re thankful for, but more importantly, who we’re thankful for. And I’m surely thankful for my parents and my dad.
