Friends Are The Family You Get To Choose For Yourself

Friends Are The Family You Get To Choose For Yourself

We're not related, but we're family.
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Now, I'm sure everyone has those friends in their life who are like family. Some added brothers, sisters, even chosen parents. But have you ever had a friend become like a cousin? No?

Well, let me explain it to you.

First off, I am the type of person who is extremely close with my cousins. Growing up without siblings, they were the closest thing I had to that.

Family, overall, is very important to me, but there is just some special bond with my cousins that is different from every other friendship I've ever made.

So, when my best friend told me that our mutual friend and I acted like cousins, I had to ponder it for a bit.

My cousins mean the world to me, and I would take a bullet for them. They're my built-in best friends. This friend of mine had such a familiar feeling about him — like he was a cousin.

And I didn't notice until someone pointed it out to me.

And since I've come to notice that, I'm thankful. It hasn't made our friendship weird or pushed apart. If anything, it's drawn us closer together.

And not only have we grown closer, gaining a better friend in one another, I've gained another cousin! And I think we already covered how important cousins are to me.

This friend is truly my newfound cousin.

I would take a bullet for him or defend him to a crowd just like I would for my own blood cousins. I have no shame sending him ugly Ssnapchats or rambling about a stupid story just like I would to my own family. There's a familiarity, a comfortable feeling, in this chosen cousinship.

We might not be related by blood, but he's definitely my family.

Every time I think about the fact that we're like "cousins," I laugh. I had never heard of such a thing until I experienced it.

It's funny to think how he's like a cousin to me rather than a brother or even just my best friend.

But no word describes his role in my life better than "cousin." I have a hard time letting people in and believing they'll stay in my life. And the thing about cousins is that most of the time they're kind of forced to deal with you.

The complicated thing about this cousinship is that he doesn't have that "force." His parents aren't related to mine, we don't have similar family members.

He owes me absolutely nothing, even when I'm a complete jerk (because trust me, I know I can be a jerk to my cousins sometimes).

But for some weird reason, I trust him and I've let him into my "family." And I hope and pray that he stays my cousin for a long while, no matter how intolerable I become.

Friends are family that you choose. I am thankful to have chosen him as my cousin.

Cover Image Credit: Abigail Stout

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5 Perks Of Having A Long-Distance Best Friend

The best kind of long-distance relationship.
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Sometimes, people get annoyed when girls refer to multiple people as their "best friend," but they don't understand. We have different types of best friends. There's the going out together best friend, the see each other everyday best friend and the constant, low maintenance best friend.

While I'm lucky enough to have two out of the three at the same school as me, my "low maintenance" best friend goes to college six hours from Baton Rouge.

This type of friend is special because no matter how long you go without talking or seeing each other, you're always insanely close. Even though I miss her daily, having a long-distance best friend has its perks. Here are just a few of them...

1. Getting to see each other is a special event.

Sometimes when you see someone all the time, you take that person and their friendship for granted. When you don't get to see one of your favorite people very often, the times when you're together are truly appreciated.

2. You always have someone to give unbiased advice.

This person knows you best, but they probably don't know the people you're telling them about, so they can give you better advice than anyone else.

3. You always have someone to text and FaceTime.

While there may be hundreds of miles between you, they're also just a phone call away. You know they'll always be there for you even when they can't physically be there.

4. You can plan fun trips to visit each other.

When you can visit each other, you get to meet the people you've heard so much about and experience all the places they love. You get to have your own college experience and, sometimes, theirs, too.

5. You know they will always be a part of your life.

If you can survive going to school in different states, you've both proven that your friendship will last forever. You both care enough to make time for the other in the midst of exams, social events, and homework.

The long-distance best friend is a forever friend. While I wish I could see mine more, I wouldn't trade her for anything.

Cover Image Credit: Just For Laughs-Chicago

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My Boyfriend Has A Girl Best Friend, And That's More Than OK

I know the boyfriend with a girl best friend stigma is scary, but I promise they aren't all like that.

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Ah yes, you start seeing this guy and he's super incredible. He's everything you could've ever hoped for and more. He's sweet to you and your family, he's loving (bonus, he's also super cute). Nothing could take away this incredible feeling.

Then he tells you his best friend is a girl.

I can't lie, it always rubs me the wrong way too, at first. I've been in a relationship where I was seeing a guy who had a girl best friend. And despite better judgement, I let it slide. Only for him and I to stop dating and he start dating her a month later.

Ouch.

But I can promise you, it isn't always like that. Is it scary to think about? Of course. When my current boyfriend had told me I was going to meet his girl best friend, I wasn't thrilled about it. As sweet and nice as she was when I met her, I still wasn't thrilled about it. We had just started dating, so I hadn't yet gotten over those insecurities yet.

Questions ran threw my head. Had they ever had feelings for each other? Do they have feelings for each other and just won't act on them for the sake of their friendship? I couldn't seem to get my head to stop.

Until I started to talk to her more.

When I tell you, the best thing you can do in ANY relationship, is become friends with their best friend. They know everything about your significant other. The good, the bad and everything in between. You'll learn more about your boyfriend/girlfriend from their family and best friend than you will from them. You see a different side of them when they're with them.

To say I was apprehensive at first is probably an understatement. It didn't help that I had this awful gut feeling that she hated me. (BTDubstep, her and I are best friends now). But, after letting go of those insecurities and getting to know her, I realized that there was no form of intimacy or flirtatiousness between them at all. I had no worries because I trusted both of them.

She actually lives with him and his other brother. People always laugh at me when I tell them that because they think the stereotype and assume they have a thing. I love my boyfriend, I trust my boyfriend. I love his(and no mine) best friend, I trust her. There's nothing we don't share with one another because all 3 of us are very open with communication.

Just because your significant other is best friends with someone of the opposite sex, doesn't mean they're in love with them, or that they are trying to sleep with them.

Take the shot, the worst that happens is they do have a thing and you break up. If that's the case, they aren't right for you anyway. But take the shot, you might even gain yourself another best friend.

I know I did.

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