We met our freshman year of college. We lived right next door to each other; go figure. Ironically enough, our friendship blossomed over our shared predicament of having horrific roommates. To get away from them, we found ourselves spending countless hours in the lobby bonding over our love for Taylor Swift and coffee. Instantly, I knew we were going to be great friends. We would have crazy nights full of laughter and Domino's pizza. It was as if we had been friends for years. I never thought I'd see the day where we would treat each other like complete strangers.
Soon enough, we were taking on sophomore year and our friendship was just as close knit. Practically everyone and anyone knew that we were best friends. We were each other’s shoulders to lean on when life got too rough. You were there for me when I was picking up the pieces of my broken heart. As I was there for you when your “almost” relationship constantly came back to haunt you. We were there for each other through the good times and the bad.
Then junior year came and I noticed that change was in the air. Change is bound to happen in college, it’s inevitable. Yet, I never thought that another girl could change you so much that I could no longer recognize you as my best friend. Who is this other girl? She is your new best friend, of course. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am a firm believer that a girl can have multiple best friends. This is not one of those stories of a friendship gone bad due to jealousy. This is a friendship that disintegrated due to change.
It all started with your persona. I noticed that your caring persona slowly started to become an apathetic persona. Then you changed your appearance. You changed the way you dressed, the way did your hair, and your attitude. You made all those changes not to be modern, but to be more like her. It was as if you were becoming a carbon copy of her. And I wasn’t the only person who noticed this. People would even confuse the two of you for each other. Everywhere you went, she was with you. It would even be considered odd if anyone saw you and her not together.
The girl I knew as my best friend was dissolving right in front of me. The girl who had her own opinion and could stand on her own was nowhere in sight. Where did you go? She became an echo and no longer a voice. The leader I once saw was now a follower.
In that moment, I knew then that we could no longer be friends. I couldn’t handle having that harmful energy in my life. Looking back, do I regret our friendship? Not at all. You opened my mind to new things and taught me many valuable lessons. It was you who had me change my tune on sororities and encouraged me to check out greek life. If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have found my big sister to help guide me through this crazy thing called life. I wouldn’t have found my forever home in my sorority, so I’d like to thank you for that. From our friendship, you helped me see that I stand for strong friendships that constantly push you to be a better person. I don’t stand for friends who change to be a look-a-like of someone else. You shouldn’t lose yourself in a friendship with anyone. That is what you taught me. I learned that my identity shouldn’t be the cost of a friendship.
Right now, the door on our friendship is closed. There is nothing wrong with cutting ties on friendships that no longer benefits someone. To me, keeping a friendship that doesn't serve to make you a better person would be equivalent to keeping a pair of shoes that you've outgrown.They no longer have a purpose nor benefit you, so it’s time to give it away.
As you move on with your life, I wish nothing but the best for you. Maybe the door on our friendship doesn't have a lock on it and one day we can be friends again. Until then, I am going to keep moving forward and surround myself with positive people who encourage me to be the best version of myself and no one else. I suggest you do the same.
