Everyone is afraid of some form of failure. Failed careers, relationships, attempts at keeping a plant alive. If you claim to have never feared failure, you’re either lying to yourself, or you're a robot because it’s simply a part of what makes us human. I used to avoid situations that could potentially end in rejection, criticism, or, you guessed it— failure. But, news flash, that’s not living and no one feels sorry for you.

As cliché as it may sound, I’ve always dreamed of greatness, whether it meant to inspire others for the better, or make a positive change in the world. I thoroughly enjoy taking leadership positions and working with people toward a common goal, but I promise you I was not always like this. Like I said earlier I was an avoider, and I probably just wanted to keep my ego in check. It was a mentality that gave little room for personal growth and improvement. More importantly, it was a cycle I needed to get out of if I truly wanted to be successful.

It’s easier said than done, to become immune to the anxiety failure can conjure up in our psyche but, it’s important to note that it does more good than harm. I’ve observed recently that more and more people living with that fear will blame the world or individuals around them for their misfortunes. They will burrow away in a dark place and live and breathe the “woe is me” mentality. I say, for lack of better words, that’s a load of crap.

The real reason you aren’t achieving your goals is that somewhere, deep down, you’re afraid you might fail. You’re afraid that you will disappoint others, or worse, embarrass yourself. While you continue to feel sorry for yourself, others are working hard to make their dreams a reality. While they are being held accountable for their failures, you’re allowing them to define you.

Here’s another newsflash, the world won’t wait for you. In 2005, Steve Jobs gave a commencement address to the graduates of Stanford University, here’s what he said about failure: “...remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything –– all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure –– just falls away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important”.

Hopefully, many of us are years away from the inevitable, but Jobs made a valid point. As humans, we’re only here for a short amount of time. If you want to get out there and make your dreams come true, you can’t focus on what may or may not happen. You need to work for it, relentlessly.

You need to have enough faith in your skills, your capacity to love, your ability to water a plant every now and then, and put action to thoughts and words. You need to be able to learn from failures instead of allowing them to keep you down. You need to be accountable for your life’s goals and aspirations and take responsibility for when things go awry.

Half of the battle of achieving success is believing in yourself. If we put half as much effort into believing in ourselves as we do feeding into the fear of failure, I’m positive we would be leading much more fulfilling lives. There will be obstacles of course, that goes without saying, but having the resilience to keep pushing, thriving, and surviving after every trial and error will eventually lead to the greatness you so deeply desire.