For years I have been asked why I have not tied the knot with my boyfriend of six years. People do not seem to understand why were are waiting to take our relationship to the next level, especially since we have both made it known that we plan on getting married in the future. There are numerous articles being passed around about getting married young and although I see many benefits in it, I do not think that getting married before I graduate college is the right choice for my relationship.
I come from a divorced family and I am not saying that getting married young leads to divorce, but coming from a divorced family has given me a perspective on how to avoid certain things that do typically lead to divorce. For example, many couples marry before they are financially stable, which creates reasons to fight. They are not able to support themselves and then they are not able to support a family. Once their little family grows, they become overwhelmed and they cannot handle the stress. I want to have this part figured out so we have no reason to fight or worry about money. I understand that sometimes things go out of order and that families can start before the bank account says it's okay, but this is just something that I think I need to figure out before tying the knot!
Another reason why I do not think I should get married "young" is because I think that we both need time to grow and find ourselves as individuals. My parents rushed into a marriage, because the idea of getting married is new and refreshing. Were they in love? Yes, of course they were! But were they prepared for marriage and all that it entails? Not one bit! They had dated for years, but neither one was prepared for the future. They looked back ten years later and realized that they were two different people, they had grown individually but they were no longer the same two people that had gotten married! I think if I have this time to grow while in the dating stage, we will avoid this problem!
The biggest reason is that we just aren't ready! We are not ready to settle down and have a family right now. We are not ready to buy a little house to start our family in. We don't mind having our own space right now. We don't mind taking things slow. We have still been together for the major milestones of life. We are still seeing and experiencing the world together. I know that he is the man I am going to marry. There is no doubt in my mind about that! But I do not think that we are ready as individuals to come together as one.
I am not in anyway looking down on people who do choose to get married young, because every relationship is different and everyones idea of a perfect timeline for a relationship is different, but I wanted people to see why getting married young isn't for everyone!
Don't get me wrong, I have a wedding Pinterest board with millions of wedding rings, dresses, and ideas saved. I talk about getting married to my boyfriend on a daily basis, and it is something that I am so excited for. But it just isn't time for this dream to become a reality yet, and that is okay! For us taking things slow is the way to go!
