We each have our own routine that we follow. Be it a morning ritual, a typical route to work, or the series of steps we take for the perfect sandwich, patterns make up our lives. Perhaps that is why people get so prickly when those patterns change.

Anyone that has worked in a guest service position, or really any job dealing with people at all, have a solid grasp on how most people behave when not given what they demand. That is not to say that everyone encountered is selfish, but that petty tantrums are not uncommon.

One theory behind these reactions is how uncharacteristic behavior is created by an unexpected action or response that is inconsistent with any expected would-be results. This violation of foresight is actually the usual cause for conflict among people. Sometimes expectations can go as far as believing and arguing that an individual holds the rights to all sorts of amenities, even if none are truly deserved. In short, alterations to an ongoing rhythm results in copious amounts of pouting.

"Beware the groove!"

The consequences of actions are rarely meant as slights, but can be perceived as such. For example, coupons are one of the best ways to save money, however, there are limits to their use. Expiration dates and terms of use set grounds for any discounts; anything short of the guidelines means no discount. This can be perceived as an act of disregard toward the user of the coupon. It can be seen as a tool being used against the holder because the person denying actually has a vendetta against him or her. Not true.

To get technical, this can result in something that is commonly referred to as a halo/horn effect. Basically it is the attribution of positive or negative attributes based on whether or not you like somebody from an experience. This is sort of a set for another one of those "rhythms" that I spoke about before. It is hard to break this habit because it is a natural reaction to any situation. In one way or another, we all want to be liked, and anyone that seems to go against our perceptions of what it means to achieve that is out to get us.

The truth hurts.

A significant portion of this can be attributed to any entitlements that the public can be assumed to feel. Monetary benefits and social courtesies are among the most common subjects of focus when these perceived entitlements become apparent. An example of this would be if a customer visits a fast food restaurant and orders something out of stock, they will either respond with begrudged disappointment or with understanding of the situation, depending on their personal claims.

Yet, truth be told, there is an allotted amount of general respect required to function properly when being a part of the public world. Social responsibilities consist mostly of implicit and explicit contracts that everyone can agree upon – nonviolence among one another, safeguarding of the young and helpless, and genuine acknowledgement of personal space and property are some examples of this. Any trespass on expectations such as these will result in mass discountenance and can be deemed as a serious relational transgression.

"I understand now."

While there are these rules to protect our sense of belonging, the unfortunate truth about why some people find themselves reacting poorly comes down to self-importance and levels of narcissism. The fixation on maintaining patterns is so strong that it actually overshadows whatever truths are trying to be revealed. This could easily be remedied by admitting fault or taking responsibility for actions, but that is unlikely, because that would mean personal expectations were incorrect and would somehow make you seem less valuable. It is a sort of saving-face reaction to continue arguing even if you know you are wrong. Well, sometimes you are wrong. Get over it.

No. No. Let's take a step back.

It is easy to get caught up in trying to be right all the time, but, people, none of us are psychic. If you just so happen to have gotten everything right so far, Miss Cleo would be proud. Yet, understand that we are all human, and that whether or not you believe something should and will happen a certain way does not guarantee any results or reciprocity. Do not consider all changes to plans as a problem, but see it as an opportunity to prove your flexibility and ability to show compassion and understanding, because chances are that the person on the other side of the counter will be just as stressed as you are when they have to deny your request.