If you're heading to university this fall, chances are you've got a lot of questions and concerns about the whole thing! Parents and teachers are great but come on, it's been like, what? Six millennia since they were in school? You need current answers! Well, worry no longer because I have asked 12 of my fellow ex-freshmen some of the most important questions about university and they're here to give you the scoop! (And some very good advice.)
What were you most nervous about when you first came to university? What did you discover about those fears by the end of the year?
Meghan: I was most nervous about finding a close knit group of friends. By the end of the year I knew that I never had anything to worry about because I have gained some of my best friends in the world this past year.
Hannah: I was most afraid of making new friends and feeling homesick. I felt like my only friends would be freshmen and that all upper classman would ignore me. I was afraid I would be desperate for home. I was wrong on both counts! Not only did I make a large amount of freshman friends and some sophomores, but I made a ton of junior and senior friends, too! They were all extremely welcoming and friendly and I don't think I was ever home sick even once!
Emily: I was most nervous that I wouldn't make any friends because I had problems making friends in high school. I discovered that in college everyone is much more open to get to know people and willing to hang out with anyone. It was a lot easier to make friends and form relationships with all sorts of people.
Meredith: I was most nervous about making friends, and it turned out to be much harder than I thought.
MD: I was nervous about becoming independent and living in the middle of nowhere. My family was hundreds of miles away and Alfred is so far from everything else. This became the best thing about Alfred. AU was like an entire world all to myself. I was able to discover who I was inside this little town on a hill.
Tiana: When I first came to university, I was really afraid that I would have trouble making friends, or that I would miss my friends/boyfriend from back home so much that it would make finding new friends difficult. This was definitely not the case! It might be partially because of the major and program that I was in, which emphasized group projects and collaboration, but overall I found it much easier to connect with other people when I had a "fresh start" with them.
E: I think I was most nervous about finding friends. I found that you really only have to be yourself and friends will find you.
Abbey W: I thought that responsibility would be the scariest part of being on my own for 50 percent of the year. However, I have learned to love responsibility and making my own decisions.
Anonymous: I feared about not being able to fit in, then by the end of the year I realized that nobody really cares about what you do, they're too busy worrying about themselves.
Gabrielle: I was nervous if I was going to make it. I found out college isn't necessarily for everyone. I'm glad I figured it out before going into debt.
R: I was most nervous about making friends, since that's something I really struggle with. What I found out was that many other people had that same fear as well. Everyone was terrified and looking to make friends. It came quite easily, and by getting involved in extracurriculars, I made friends with similar interests.
What were you most excited about?
Meghan: I was most excited about living on my own and managing my whole life.
ER: Learning things I actually want to learn about! (And that definitely happened!)
Hannah: I was very excited for the new art projects and getting into theater. I'm an art student and I already knew I was going to face new and exciting art projects but the theater was calling my name. I joined a theater club and auditioned for the first semester play. I even took a class that involved a performance. It took a lot of my free time up but I don't regret it at all! It opened up several new doors including working with students on acting/directing projects and a trip to Westchester, Pennsylvania for a theater festival! (KCACTF). And I don't mean to brag but I was another freshman's partner for the Irene Ryan's and we made it to round two! We were the only all freshman team to go to the second round this century! It was an amazing experience. I couldn't have asked for more.
Emily: I was most excited about a completely new experience. I was excited to leave my home and boring everyday life and become my own person. I wanted to discover more about myself and the world and I truly think that I grew a lot as a person and in my views and understanding of the world just from my first year of college.
Meredith: I was most excited about my classes and meeting new people.
MD: Being surrounded by artists for the first time. I don't know many at home and I was so ready to meet other people like me that were just as passionate about the art world.
Tiana: I was most excited about having the freedom to just go out and do something without feeling like I needed a reason to; to be able to go get a coffee, or take a walk alone, just because I felt like it, has become so important to me. It sounds a little stupid, but it's really nice to not feel obligated to tell anyone why you're leaving the house (dorm).
E: I was most excited about being able to focus on art and what I like to do.
Abbey W: Learning more about the subject I love, engineering!
Anonymous: My classes!
Gabrielle: I was excited for the campus/area. It's quiet.
R: Honestly, I was very excited to get away from home. Things had been a little rough and I needed time to worry about only myself. It turned out to be the best decision for my mental health to live on campus.
How were your classes different from high school? What is your advice for incoming freshmen about classes?
Meghan: My classes in college were larger and covered a lot more material than those I had in high school. College courses breeze through material at a much quicker rate than high school ones. I would tell freshman to balance their schedules and learn which studying habits work the best for them. Don't stress out too much! It all works out by the end of the semester.
ER: Read the syllabus and know the syllabus. If you can get ahead on projects, get bonus points, or get out of taking the final, do it!
Hannah: My classes were especially different because they were mostly just studios but the academic classes were exactly what you'd expect. You receive the assignments and are expected to do them, and do them well. My advice: be realistic. This is college. Do you really believe you can get by never reading and half-assing all of your assignments? You're paying to be there. Take your academics seriously. Talk to your professors if you have questions! Read the syllabus!! And remember: you are paying to be there. I cannot emphasize that enough. Don't waste your money. Absorb all the knowledge you can. It's worth it.
Emily: The classes were completely different from high school. I liked them a lot more because I felt much more in control of my learning experience. The professors left it up to us to get what we wanted out of the classes, we could choose to come to class and do all our work to truly get as much out of it as possible. We also had the freedom to not show up, do our work, or participate. This was great for me but I can see how it could be bad for less motivated students. Just be sure to make your classes your priority and always be aware of your assignments and requirements. You have to be much more responsible and organized than in high school, as the professors aren’t constantly reminding you telling you what you should be doing, it's all up to you.
Meredith: Professors really seem to care about what they're teaching. It's much easier to stay engaged in class, but make sure you stay on top of deadlines. Every professor has a different way of doing things and different policies, so keep an eye on the syllabus.
MD: The teachers were more relaxed than in high school, they didn't remind you of homework or warn you about grades. If you failed that was it, you failed. Make two friends in each class. If you don't know the homework ask both of them, you have a better chance of getting the right answer.
Tiana: Generally, my classes were harder than most high school classes in that there was more work to do, but easier in that I didn't have to take many classes in subjects which are especially difficult for me (ex: math). Being able to choose your major and the classes you take is so worth the extra work, and I think most people will find that there are a variety of classes which they'll actually find very interesting. (Which is sadly not the case for most high schoolers.)
E: Classes are much longer and more specified. Be prepared for a hefty workload and manage your time wisely. Almost nothing in actuality is like the movies.
Abbey W: My classes required more preparation, but were more interesting because they all apply to what I like and my major. As long as you set aside time for studying, you'll be golden.
Anonymous: The work may be harder but just stay focused and don't get distracted.
Gabrielle: I felt I didn't have to go to some to know what was going on, yet you were required to sit through the same thing every day. Or the class I needed to keep up with was always cancelled. This was never the deal in high school.
R: The pace of the classes was definitely a lot faster than what I was used to from high school. With that said, I would say if you know you're a slow writer, then a laptop is the best way to go to ensure you get all the important information down. Don't write down every single thing on the slide. Listen to the teacher as they talk. What comes out of their mouth tends to be the most important information.
In what other ways is university different from high school?
Meghan: The biggest difference is that you are on your own, going through each step of the day with freedom to take it in whichever direction you'd like. There's a lot of change that occurs when you go to college, but the majority of it is great change that you never realized how much you wanted it until you get it.
ER: Everyone's always says "the freedom" and that's pretty true. There's no bell to dismiss you from class. You can have classes rather late into the day.
Hannah: You are completely free! High school is wandering around a building for seven hours straight. College is going to class, eating lunch with friends, going to another class, taking a nap, studying, hanging with friends, shower, bed. You can do anything whenever you want!
You wanna meet your friends at 11 p.m. for a bite to eat? You can just do it. There's nothing stopping you. It's liberating and wonderful. High school does not have to be the best years of your life.
Emily: It's different on pretty much every level. You are completely independent and free to make your own choices. There are no authorities telling you what's best and what you should and should not be doing.
Meredith: It doesn't feel like school because your classes are spread out. Time management becomes more important, because while you have your usual projects and assignments, you also have to stay on top of laundry, cleaning, appointments, and errands.
MD: You don't really get to be alone. Everywhere you go there are people around you. In high school, you go home and watch tv. In college you go to your room and hope your roomate isn't sleeping or your loud neighbors aren't home.
Tiana: In my opinion, university is better than high school in nearly every way. While there are plenty of people who are still immature, college very quickly helps you learn so much about yourself, and that new understanding makes it much easier to interact with all the new people and situations. While there's a considerable amount of stress involved in college life, almost everyone I know likes college and their "college selves" better than high school and their "high school selves”.
E: Much more freedom. Much more responsibility. A lot of potential stress, just be prepared.
Abbey W: Social life is far better in college than in high school. You get to hang out with your friends whenever you want, and have a bigger voice as a result.
Anonymous: A lot more going on and you're not at home anymore.
Gabrielle: The day is really split up. But you get to be with people who are at the same level as you which is really helpful to moving forward.
R: I feel as though there's a lot less judgement. You're not in classes with the same people every day for four years. These people don't know you as well. You're free to be your own person, figure out what you want from life, more or less free from the judgement of others. There's an overall greater maturity level from all.
Was this your first time living away from your parents for an extended time? What was good/bad about it? What is your advice to freshmen about living on their own?
Meghan: I was fine living without my family for the first time! I only came home over holiday breaks, but my family did come up and visit me about once a month. I had an easy time adjusting to living four hours away from the people I was used to seeing every day. I would advise freshman to keep in touch, send updates here and there, and always pick up the phone when a family member calls.
ER: This was my first time living away from my parents. A good thing about it is I became more organized since no one was there to remind me to do things. The bad part is I felt like I missed out on a lot at home. My advice is to get into a routine for things like laundry and cleaning, so you won't forget.
Hannah: This was my first time living away from my parents and I loved it all, but I've always been looking forward to my independent living. The only bad thing was not having my pets with me. My advice: Do not, I repeat do not, just sit in your dorm all day. You ever hear someone complain, "Ugh (this college) sucks. There's nothing to do!"? Well, they definitely haven't even tried to see what's going on around campus because there's always something. And if there isn't anything, hang out with some friends! Don't get stuck up in your room it'll make your college experience seem negative and you don't want it to be! Speaking of which, another piece of advice: don't go into college dreading certain things because of something someone told you. No one gets to tell you how you feel about something, you do. You get to decide if you hate college or not. Just don't go into it already hating it. You'll never change your mind.
Emily: It was my first time living away from my parents. I loved it. I was very nervous about it, especially because I am very close to my mother and talk to her about everything. I found that it was much easier to live away from them than I thought, and it was actually very good for me. I gained confidence in my own decisions and character, and learned that I can live in the world on my own, and succeed. I definitely grew as a person more in this first year of college than in the rest of my life.
Meredith: It was my first time being away from home for so long, and while it was freeing, it was hard not having the safety net of my parents. I'm six hours from home so I can't just visit for a weekend. It helps to make frequent calls and send gifts or letters to stay connected.
MD: I loved having freedom from adults, maybe a bit too much but it was a good experience. I've never been away from them for more than a week, but it really wasn't as difficult as I thought. I adjusted pretty well. Make sure you find time to do things for yourself. Go for a walk, watch a movie, read a book. I wake up an hour early just so I can take my time to do my morning routine.
Tiana: Yes, this was my first time being away from my parents for an extended period of time-- and I cannot begin to describe how much of a relief it was! I did miss them a little, and I know some people who have more tight-knit families might have struggled with not seeing their parents. But for me, as someone whose family life is a little complicated, it was a huge weight off of my shoulders to have some distance from them.
E: Yeah it was, and there wasn't really anything bad about it that I can think of, just more responsibility. The usual adult things. If you miss home, take your mind off it with something fun.
Abbey W: This was not my first time away from my parents for awhile. I spent a month in Montana with my great aunt when I was 15. However, it was my first time being responsible for myself. My advice is to stay focused on priorities like school, friends, cleaning, and health. Partying, relationships, and events come secondary.
Anonymous: The good was meeting friends and controlling what I could do. The bad was not getting to see my family as often. My advice is keep in contact through Skype or FaceTime.
Gabrielle: Not really. But I always missed being with my family. They're all the best people. But being on my own felt really great. I've never wanted anything more. Except having the "babysitter" RAs, all was great.
R: Yes, this was my first time. The worst parts were getting myself to the dining hall for meals, and waking myself up in time for classes. I liked the increased freedom, however. No nagging, haha! All I can say is find what motivates you to wake up, eat, stay healthy, do your homework, etc. This is your lifeline!
How did your personal habits change at university? (ex: clothing, laundry, eating, time management)
Meghan: Now that I was able to build my own schedule in college, I discovered times that I liked to eat, days that I was able to do laundry, and how to fit a solid mix of school, activities, and fun into every day. I believe I stayed just as busy at school as I was back home and in high school. I only really altered the time of day I did certain things.
ER: This is the first time I've done laundry on my own, and even now at home I still do it! I like to think my time management got better, between balancing all my classes and responsibilities.
Hannah: They didn't really at all honestly. I already do all my own laundry at home, clean my own room, and usually have to eat on my own. So it basically all stayed the same in college.
Emily: My eating changed drastically in college. I was always very picky and the dining hall food was absolutely disgusting to me. I lived on salad and the occasional sandwich. It was hard to eat healthy as the fruit and vegetables were not very fresh. Also all the stress from my classes influenced my eating habits. I often went all day without eating because of all the work I had and ended up eating a lot of extremely unhealthy food late at night because of how starving I became. Make sure to make being healthy and taking care of yourself a priority, as it is very easy to fall into these unhealthy eating habits and feel terrible. Also, the amount of work I had a day led me to become extremely sleep deprived. I was good about doing all my work and not putting it off, but I worked so hard and long (especially on my art projects) that it drove me crazy and I went many nights with very little to no sleep. Be sure to know when to stop, and not over work yourself, you hit a point where you can no longer work efficiently and you must walk away to make any progress.
Meredith: I became much more of a neat freak, and became much more prompt about time management. I ate better, but completely lost my workout routine.
MD: I take better care of myself in college. At home I was more laid back about laundry and eating habits but now that I see people all day every day I'm a bit more careful with my routines.
Tiana: Unfortunately, one of the things I learned about myself in college is that I have several bad personal habits when it comes to living on my own - including being very disorganized. I'm working to remedy this, though. Many people I know have found they have similar tendencies.
E: Well I realized that you don't have all the time you want/need to do something. Sometimes you'll only have like 15 minutes to eat and that sucks. Make a schedule if that helps but be ready to improvise and adapt.
Abbey W: Well, for starters, I actually do my own laundry now. Also, I am slowly learning how to force my vegetables down.
Gabrielle: I think I eat less now. I have switched to pods for laundry and do multiple loads in one day now.
R: Time management skills improved greatly. I didn't care as much about my appearances. My overall health diminished.
Did you encounter different people at university? How has this impacted you?
Meghan: I have encountered a huge variety of individuals in college. I've met people from a whole list of different countries, people with all kinds of awesome talents, and people with the most intelligence I've ever seen in a teenager. I think the diversity within the student body is what makes college so interesting and fun.
Hannah: Yes! I encountered every stereotype of art, theater, and engineering student. I was a bit surprised on how true some of those stereotypes are. But I also met warm, caring, and incredibly nice people. Seriously the most amazing wonderful people I have ever met, I met in college. I also met some people who still make drama, but the beauty of college is that you can literally drop them at anytime. The biggest impact though? They helped me realize who I actually am, and they've helped me begin to love myself again. There really are good people out there, you just have to find them.
Emily: My university was very diverse in all senses of the word. I loved the chance to meet and get to know all kinds of people. Though my high school had many different races and people of all different sexualities, it was refreshing to meet people from all kinds of places, from big cities, to suburbs, to farm towns. Getting to know all these different kinds of people helped me learn more about the world, and understand people and myself more.
Meredith: There are all sorts of people, even at a smaller school. It makes me optimistic about finding people I connect with.
MD: It's great to find so many types of people in one area, it gave me so many different views and opinions about things I'd only heard one side of before.
Tiana: I encountered a wide variety of people at university, and managed to make friends with people I may have never opened up to in high school. I definitely found that college friendships tend to be a little more honest, because it's easier to boldly be yourself around strangers than people who have known you since you were young.
E: A lot more diversity and it was very welcomed.
Abbey W: I have met many different types of people who show me different views on the same things.
Gabrielle: Not really. I came from a diverse home town.
What was your experience with friends and social interaction at university? What is your advice to freshmen about friends?
Meghan: My friend group changed throughout the year, which is bound to happen when you're constantly meeting new people. I stayed acquaintances with nearly everyone I met and by the end of the year I had an amazing group of best friends. I would tell all freshman, don't worry you'll find your niche.
ER: I wasn't sure what to expect when it came to friends. Luckily, it proved easier than I thought. Between my major (music, a very family-like department) and the floor of my building, I made several friends and acquaintances to sit by when eating or in a new class. My advice is don't be worried about making friends. If someone invites you to go to a game or activity, do it! There are plenty of opportunities and new people to meet every day.
Hannah: Nothing but a good experience (with the exception of one nasty girl I met the first weekend). I love all my friends. Truly some of the most wonderful people I have ever met.
My advice: Leave yourself open and people will come right in. I mean metaphorically of course. Well...actually literally too! I left my dorm room door open once and made a new friend!
Emily: I made some great friends my first year of college. It can be very overwhelming at first, all the new people you will meet, and relationships you will form. Just know that a lot of the friends you make at the very beginning will not be your true friends you spend your time with by the end of the year. Just be open to meet everyone, and let your natural friendships form.
Meredith: I didn't make many friends, but my advice would be to go to events, and don't be afraid to make friends. If you don't end up clicking with a group very well, you can always try another group.
MD: You get to know people really quickly, after 2 months I knew some people better than the friends I knew back home for several years. Make as many friends as you can. You can't have too many, they will soon feel like your family.
Tiana: I've mentioned this in previous answers, but in my experience, you will make more open, honest friendships more easily in college.
E: Find people you can be comfortable with. If they don't like you for you, they aren't worth your time.
Abbey W: I'm naturally outgoing, so I made many friends on campus. My advice is to always keep an open mind about those around you. They might be the best friend you ever had.
Gabrielle: People are trying to make friends so much immediately. Just find a few and enjoy yourselves.
R: There was a lot more people of different races than at my high school, particularly those of my own. It was a nice change to see people who looked like me. Allowed me to minimize the self hatred which had taken residence within me.
And there you have it; hopefully we've been able to shed a little light on what to expect with expectations, changes, independence and friends at university. Stay tuned next week for even more insight including relationships, room mates, parties, and more. And if you have any burning questions of your own, feel free to leave a comment!
