You're convinced you want it all to end. No more tears, no more pain, no more anything. You're convinced that the life you're living is so horrible that you don't want to live it anymore. You're convinced that taking your own life will make everything so much better. You'll just say good-bye to the life you were blessed with and disappear as if you never existed. Your mind becomes so consumed by your own thoughts of suicide that the most important thing is being forgotten: those around you. This decision you had just made has sent all the pain you had felt onto all those who love you; even those who don't. Your parents are going to have to walk past your empty bedroom every single day, your siblings are going to question if one stupid fight you had caused you to do this to yourself, your teachers and classmates are going to sit in a now awkward classroom knowing one of those students had taken their own life. All those people who work in the same building, go to the same school, or are your social media friend are going to be posting things regarding your incredible life; how they didn't know you but wish they did and how they wish they would have known your struggles so they could help. You may think this decision is going to cause people to forget about you, but it is going to cause people to remember you more than they ever have. So many people are going to develop extreme feelings of guilt, helplessness, and their own depression. More and more people you know are going to start to question their existence and blame themselves for the choice you had made. A chain reaction of suicide, self-harm and depression has started and it is all because you wouldn't get help. Yes, life does get hard but there is no better feeling than being able to look back on the hard times and proudly say “I made it" while you're sitting at your house with surrounded by your loved ones. There is no better feeling than using those hard times as a way to help others get through the same thing. There are many people who love you, but of course you don't see that because you shut it out. Being so consumed by these thoughts has caused a blindness towards things that matter. There are many alternatives to suicide, and using those resources will be the best choice you ever make. Think about it, a year from now can be the best year of your life, but you will miss out on it if you don't allow yourself to get there.
National Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
