“You’re in a long distance relationship?” (Gasp) “That must be so hard!” “Do you think it will last?” “Does he know you go to parties?” “Do you ever see each other?” These are some of the responses I get when I tell people I am in a long distance relationship.

One time I was asked, “Well your boyfriend is so far away, so while he is gone are you going to hook up with other guys?” Needless to say my jaw dropped, and I decided to clear the air about long distance relationships (LDR).

There are two key parts to long distance relationship (LDR)- the “long distance” part and the “relationship” part.   

The long distance part-- to me this means you two love birds are further apart than, say, a town apart. Getting into the car to drive ten minutes does not constitute being in a long distance relationship. Typically, long distance means across the world, across the country, or even across the state (except if its Rhode Island, because lets face it, it's only a 20 minute drive from one side to the other).   

Relationship- the same thing it always means: Two people who like (maybe even love) each other enough to make it official and admit it in front of others. Now that that's clear, there is one key thing everyone should know about LDRs- it does not work for everyone, in fact it does not for a lot of people.  

There will be fighting, most likely over stupid things, for example: 

Girlfriend: I miss you!

Boyfriend: Miss u! 

GF: Wow seriously… it took you 14 minutes to answer… Are you too busy for me? Are you at a party? 

GF: Hello…. just answer me! 

BF: Wait what????

GF: You’re cheating on me aren’t you! Just admit it!  

LDR couples will have to face the difficulty of not having any "physical action," and face the challenges of that. Just imagine being a hormone driven teenager again who has not had their first kiss, but imagine going through that every day and having there be NOTHING you can do about it. Pure torture right?

There will definitely be fits of rage and some harsh words yelled at your terrible internet connection when Skype cuts out. You will find new, horrible names to shout at the WiFi when you cannot get a connection to talk to your loved one on Skype when you have been looking forward to it all day.   

For a lot of couples, there may be trust issues. You two are so far away and, for some people, it may be tempting to dabble with people other than your significant other.   

But the harsh reality is that some couples just may not find the relationship worth it, and the distance gets the best of them.   

So, now that you know the truth about LDR you may wonder, “Why would anyone ever want to put themselves through that?” (Warning here comes the gushy side). Because, for some couples who went through this long distance torture process, they truly gain something.   

While being in a LDR you can learn four very important things about your relationship.  

You find new little reasons to love each other.  You do not simply fall in love and that is it, it is a process in which you continue falling in love. To me the best kind of love is when you continue to find more reasons to be in love with the same person.   

You try harder. You barely see each other so what is keeping each other around? It could just be the love you have or maybe you go the extra mile to show you care, whether it is as simple as sending a text saying all the things you love about the person or a grand gesture, such as booking a surprise trip to see the person.   

You appreciate one another more. That thing that may annoy you about your significant other, such as when they talk during movies or leaving the cupboard doors open, you are actually going to miss when they are gone. All of a sudden, movies will seem so quiet and dull without them asking questions. Or, you will find yourself dodging cupboard doors that are actually closed for once. The next time you see them, you will not take any moments, conversations, or kisses for granted.   

You realize that it truly is possible for love to conquer all. You may have come in wondering if the relationship was actually worth it. Was it worth the frustration of not seeing each other? You especially wondered if you could make it through it. But in the end, you did it. Not only that, but you saw, first hand, the strength your love has.   

So, next time someone says they are in a long distance relationship, do not feel bad for them. We are determined to beat the distance and show the strength of love.   

Although, no matter what, the non-physical part will always really suck.