Actually, Toxic Friendships Don't Always End In Tragedy

Actually, Toxic Friendships Don't Always End In Tragedy

Toxic friendships are known to end and cause more devastation from choosing sides to losing friends. That isn't always the case.


Friends are very important parts of our lives. They become our support system, our allies, people we can depend on, and those that can pick us up when we are down. They mean so much to us, so when friendships start to take a more toxic route, it can be devastating. I recently experienced such a friendship. This friendship ended the same way most toxic friendships end–with sides being drawn and friends being forced to choose sides, ultimately losing more friends. It was tragic.

I had been friends with someone for a few months and we became close during that period of time. We worked together and would hang out together as normal friends would. Everything seemed to be fine. We seemed to have the healthy friendship that you would expect. We enjoyed spending time together. We would make plans to get our nails done together and even went to a concert together. That's why when things started turning toxic and more negative, it came as a shock to me.

I didn't understand what I had done wrong. I didn't know why all of the sudden, someone that I was so close with and I felt that I knew very well, was suddenly a stranger to me. It was horrible. I was not unfamiliar with how it felt to go through a toxic friendship, but for it to come out of nowhere it surprised me. I found myself on the outside of a friend group that I was once a part of and considered to be my true friends. I became the brunt of their jokes. I went from having so many friends to feeling completely and utterly alone.

As things continued and my former friends continued to make up lies about me and make fun of me, I found myself becoming more frustrated and depressed. I found myself giving up and giving in to the negativity that was continuing to surround and suffocate me. That was until I found a light in my life.

Through this, I found out who my true friends were. It seems so cliché, but in this period of time, it meant the world to me. I found that I had one person that truly cared about and supported me. She became such a big and important part of my life. She defended me when I couldn't defend myself and helped me tell my truth to those that didn't know it. Doing this wasn't easy, and yet, she took on each and every task willingly. I couldn't be more grateful for her.

I also found a true and genuine best friend through this entire experience–one that saw the best in me and helped me discover that for myself. She supports me, defends and protects me, and helps me every day to gain back every ounce of self-respect and self-esteem that I once had and lost during this toxic friendship. She inspires me each day to be better and to build my self-worth so that I can finally see the person that she sees. She is a friend that I both needed and wanted. I finally have her and I couldn't be more grateful.

I also found an amazing support system through my managers at work. Each of them are truly unique and special. They care so deeply about their employees and do everything that they can to make sure we're OK. They make sure that we are safe and protected. During the worst of this entire experience, I found that I was able to turn to my managers for the help, support, and encouragement I needed. I was so lucky to have them, not only as my managers but as my friends, as well. I have never worked somewhere that I felt so comfortable, safe, and supported. And I thank them so much for that.

When this friendship first started falling apart, I began to fall apart, too. I was being mentally and physically broken and beaten down by people that I had allowed to become a part of my life. They didn't deserve to be a part of it. I blamed myself for everything that happened and slowly began to give up. I thought that I had nothing left. However, due to the love and support of my friends, I began to realize how wrong I was.

This toxic friendship that I had been part of was ending, but it didn't have to end in tragedy. Through everything, I became a stronger and healthier version of myself. I discovered my true friends and support system. I stopped feeling so alone, and that's because I wasn't alone. Everywhere I turned, I found someone who cared and was willing to help me. I definitely would not have made it through without of them. I am so blessed to have found this amazing group of people. I am truly grateful for the blessings I have received and the happiness I have gained because of the end of this toxic friendship.

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11 Ways You Found The Cristina To Your Meredith

"We're friends, real friends, and that means, no matter how long it takes, when you finally decide to look back, I'll still be here."

The term "my person" describes the relationship between two people who have reached the highest level of friendship. They're people who have ridden the roller coaster of life together for so long that their lives would be boring without each other. In "Grey's Anatomy," the characters of Meredith Grey and Cristina Yang describe each other as each other's "person." They have a perfect friendship. Everyone (including myself) strives to achieve a friendship like theirs. What is it like to have "your person?"

1. Your person will tell it like it is.

If you think that your new haircut looks bad or if that dress makes you look fat, your person is always there to reassure you that nobody cares.

2. Your person is always on your team.

Whether it's an argument between you and your parents or you and your boyfriend/girlfriend, your person will always be there. They will go to bat for you 10/10 times and they will always be there to have your back.

3. Your person will celebrate the small victories with you.

Did you go an entire day without crying? Awesome, let's celebrate! Did you eat something other than chocolate chip cookies for breakfast? That's wonderful! The small victories count the most.

4. They will listen to you, even when you are ranting about the craziest things.

Let's face it, we have all been there. When it's late at night and we're laying in bed, thinking of the world's hardest questions, and you start to think about crazy scenarios, your person is always there to listen.

5. People instantly think that you and your person are a couple.

You aren't a couple, you just understand each other on a much higher level, so people think that you guys are in a relationship. Just go with it.

6. Your person isn't afraid to tell you that they are embarrassed by you.

Everyone gets embarrassed about each other at one point or another. Most people just pretend that it doesn't happen. Your person is going to flat out tell you that your actions and the things that you say embarrass the crap out of them.

7. Your person isn't afraid to knock you down a few notches.

Just when you think that you are on top of the world, your person will come and pop the growing balloon known as your head. They aren't afraid to snap you back into reality.

8. They will build you up faster than they will tear you down.

Yes, they will bring you back to reality and tell you like it is, but they will also be the first one to encourage you and to tell you how wonderful you are.

9. Your person is not afraid to call your bluff.

They will call you out on your BS and make you tell them how you really feel, so they can help fix you.

10. You stick together no matter what.

Even though you get mad at each other, or don't speak for a few days, you will always stick together.

11. In the end, no matter what, no matter who comes in and out of your life, your person will always be your person.

Your person is there no matter what. They care when no one else does and they are always there to hold your hand.

Find your person and never let them go. They are your best friend, your worst enemy, and your biggest critic, but they know you better than you know yourself sometimes.

As for my "person," you know who you are. I love you and couldn't do life without you.

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To My Best Friend At A Rival University

No amount of school rivalry could ever change our friendship.


In high school, we were practically inseparable- you and I and all of our friends. Even though we saw each other every day during the week (when both of us decided to actually go to school, at least; senioritis was real and it was rough), we usually saw each other at least once over the weekend, whether it be a coffee date at Starbucks, a sleepover, or a trip to the movies.

We would go on spontaneous trips to the local ice cream shop (for us, it was Twistee Treat) far too often for our own good. We spent so many summer days at theme parks, followed by sleepovers that consisted of painting each other's nails, baking break-and-bake cookies, and falling asleep in the middle of 'Men in Black.'

Now, we attend rival universities. The stories we share involve names and places foreign to the other. We each have friends that know us apart from one another. Some days, we hardly get a moment to talk, other than sending funny memes back and forth through Instagram.

Though it may seem like being away at rival schools would hurt our friendship, I think it's only made us closer.

When I come to visit you (or you visit me), we always make the most of our time, knowing that it's limited. We often do the same things we would've done at home, but in new locations, which makes it even more fun. Sometimes, I wish we would've chosen the same school- because having your best friend with you, sharing new experiences is always better than not- but I know we're each happy where we are. We're making new friends and new memories, which makes for new stories to share with one another.

I know that I can share anything with you without fear of judgment, and I think you know the same.

Even though we can't just stop by unannounced anymore, planning weekend trips to visit one another is still really fun.

Sure, we go to rival universities and we will never agree on whose school is superior, but in the grand scheme, it doesn't even matter. Your school is extremely lucky to have you and in my eyes, you are what makes it great.

No matter the distance, no matter how strong the rivalry between our schools, you will always be my best friend and the memories we've cultivated throughout our friendship will never be forgotten. I can't promise I'll wear your school colors again (that was a one-time thing and does not diminish my love and respect for my school!), but I can promise that you'll always have a friend in me.

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