Toxic Friendships Don't Always End In Tragedy

Actually, Toxic Friendships Don't Always End In Tragedy

Toxic friendships are known to end and cause more devastation from choosing sides to losing friends. That isn't always the case.

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Friends are very important parts of our lives. They become our support system, our allies, people we can depend on, and those that can pick us up when we are down. They mean so much to us, so when friendships start to take a more toxic route, it can be devastating. I recently experienced such a friendship. This friendship ended the same way most toxic friendships end–with sides being drawn and friends being forced to choose sides, ultimately losing more friends. It was tragic.

I had been friends with someone for a few months and we became close during that period of time. We worked together and would hang out together as normal friends would. Everything seemed to be fine. We seemed to have the healthy friendship that you would expect. We enjoyed spending time together. We would make plans to get our nails done together and even went to a concert together. That's why when things started turning toxic and more negative, it came as a shock to me.

I didn't understand what I had done wrong. I didn't know why all of the sudden, someone that I was so close with and I felt that I knew very well, was suddenly a stranger to me. It was horrible. I was not unfamiliar with how it felt to go through a toxic friendship, but for it to come out of nowhere it surprised me. I found myself on the outside of a friend group that I was once a part of and considered to be my true friends. I became the brunt of their jokes. I went from having so many friends to feeling completely and utterly alone.

As things continued and my former friends continued to make up lies about me and make fun of me, I found myself becoming more frustrated and depressed. I found myself giving up and giving in to the negativity that was continuing to surround and suffocate me. That was until I found a light in my life.

Through this, I found out who my true friends were. It seems so cliché, but in this period of time, it meant the world to me. I found that I had one person that truly cared about and supported me. She became such a big and important part of my life. She defended me when I couldn't defend myself and helped me tell my truth to those that didn't know it. Doing this wasn't easy, and yet, she took on each and every task willingly. I couldn't be more grateful for her.

I also found a true and genuine best friend through this entire experience–one that saw the best in me and helped me discover that for myself. She supports me, defends and protects me, and helps me every day to gain back every ounce of self-respect and self-esteem that I once had and lost during this toxic friendship. She inspires me each day to be better and to build my self-worth so that I can finally see the person that she sees. She is a friend that I both needed and wanted. I finally have her and I couldn't be more grateful.

I also found an amazing support system through my managers at work. Each of them are truly unique and special. They care so deeply about their employees and do everything that they can to make sure we're OK. They make sure that we are safe and protected. During the worst of this entire experience, I found that I was able to turn to my managers for the help, support, and encouragement I needed. I was so lucky to have them, not only as my managers but as my friends, as well. I have never worked somewhere that I felt so comfortable, safe, and supported. And I thank them so much for that.

When this friendship first started falling apart, I began to fall apart, too. I was being mentally and physically broken and beaten down by people that I had allowed to become a part of my life. They didn't deserve to be a part of it. I blamed myself for everything that happened and slowly began to give up. I thought that I had nothing left. However, due to the love and support of my friends, I began to realize how wrong I was.

This toxic friendship that I had been part of was ending, but it didn't have to end in tragedy. Through everything, I became a stronger and healthier version of myself. I discovered my true friends and support system. I stopped feeling so alone, and that's because I wasn't alone. Everywhere I turned, I found someone who cared and was willing to help me. I definitely would not have made it through without of them. I am so blessed to have found this amazing group of people. I am truly grateful for the blessings I have received and the happiness I have gained because of the end of this toxic friendship.

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20 'Thank Yous' My Best Friends Need To Hear BEFORE The Semester Ends

Because I don't thank you enough.

Cassie
Cassie
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When I decided to graduate a year early, I never thought about how hard it would be to say goodbye. The best part of my three-year journey at Florida State was the friends that I had made. The friends you meet in college are the friends you will never forget. Although in two weeks we will be miles apart, this is not the end of us-- this is a different type of forever. At this point, all I can say is thank you for making my time here unforgettable. Thank you:

1. For buying me Ice Cream when I had a bad day.

2. For pushing me out of my comfort zone. 

3. For teaching me the right way to do Happy Hour. 

4. For complimenting me when I wore that tight dress.

5. For forcing me to go to the library with you.

6. For *trying* to make me go to the gym.

7. For giving me great advice that you know I won't follow. 

8. For letting me borrow your new shirt even though you haven't even worn it yet.

9. For forgiving me when I get a little sassy.

10. For telling me I can do better. 

11. For reading my shitty articles. 

12. For ignoring my absolutely terrible singing. 

13. For laughing at my jokes. 

14. For roasting me in the group chat. 

15. For driving me to class when I was too lazy to find parking. 

16. For picking me up from class when I was too lazy to walk back home.

17. For lending me money because I really REALLY needed that extra guacamole.

18. For tolerating my annoying self after your stressful day.

19. For staying up late because I didn't want to watch the scary movie alone.

20. For being the best friends I ever had.

Cassie
Cassie

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Dear Freshman Year Roommate, Thank You For Being Someone I Always Looked Forward To Hanging Out With

From the first moment we met and bonded over our love for bubble tea, I knew our friendship was going to be special.

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When I was applying for college, I was concerned with supplemental essays, SAT scores, scholarship applications and letters of recommendation. I never took a moment to stop and wonder "What happens once I get in?"

Finally, the fateful day arrived where I made my college decision. I bought a sweatshirt from the George Washington University store. My mom decorated my High School locker with our colors. And most importantly, I sighed a breath of relief imagining how refreshing it was going to be to ride out the rest of my senior year without the stress of college deadlines weighing on my shoulders.

Unfortunately, that blissful serenity was cut short when I joined a Facebook group of admitted students, where profiles of smiling teenagers flashed on my screen accompanied with the fateful "I'm looking for a roommate."

A roommate. I obviously knew that I needed a roommate. It was common sense, yet for some reason, I had failed to consider the logistics of finding a roommate until that moment.

See, my mom helped me through my college process, but times were different back then. She described showing up to her college on the first day, not knowing who she had been randomly assigned. There was no Facebook, Snapchat or Instagram to help you communicate with the girls on the other side of the country-- or sometimes even on the other side of the world.

This was a new, unexplored territory where my mother's wealth of knowledge sadly fell short.

Lucky for me, I was accepted into an honors program which restricted the list of girls available to be my roommate to a list of about twenty-five. We created a google document which asked basic questions like "Are you a night owl or earlier riser?"

Even still, I had no idea how to pick someone who I would be compatible to live with for the next year of my life. The stakes felt high, but I was reassured by the fact that I grew up sharing a room with my siblings, learning some important skills about being low-maintenance and tolerant of others' habits.

I read through the list and found someone whose answers sounded similar to mine, figuring we had enough in common to be amicable, if nothing more, throughout the school year. Her name was Riya, and she had a cute Instagram, so I messaged her asking if she wanted to try and room together. She agreed and we put each other down as roommates when applying for housing.

Looking back, that decision was the best one that I made when preparing for GW.

Throughout my freshman year, I have heard horror stories about roommates who fight all the time, steal each other's clothes, refuse to clean or try and micromanage the other's sleep schedule.

All the while, I count my lucky stars that my roommate is not only sane but someone who I genuinely look forward to spending time with. We share ice cream and inside jokes. When the weather was heating up and the university refused to turn on the air conditioning, we even shared our fans.

It comforts me to know that at the end of even the worst days, I can come back to my room and laugh or cry (sometimes both) with her by my side.

I remember once, I was having trouble with another group of friends. I felt alone and isolated. I felt like there was nobody who I could talk to apart from my mom or my best friend from home, who are both supportive and incredible but don't know any of the characters in my life in the same way as someone here at school.

I have a bad habit of struggling to reach out to people when I'm going through something, figuring I am strong enough to handle it on my own.

While that may sometimes be true, thanks to Riya, I didn't have to. I ended up telling her everything. She listened to me rant, understanding how I was hurt, and advising me on the situation.

I felt so much better after our conversation, and the best part was, I didn't have to leave the comfort of my bed for the entire conversation.

Her friendship reminded me of my family, and honestly, she has acted like a sister to me over the past two semesters.

It is so wild reflecting on the year, knowing that next semester we will be going our separate ways, living with respective friends in buildings a couple of blocks away from each other.

However, even when the posters are off the walls and signs reading "Riya" and "Emilie Joe" no longer stick to the outside of our door, I know that the bond we created in room 217 will never leave us.

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