For 17 years, Canada was my home. And although I don't technically live there anymore, for all intent and purposes, I suppose it still is. For as long as I live, I'll picture Canada as the epitome of safety – the streets, the people, the places. It's not a stereotype, everyone really is friendly and open and vulnerable. We've never had a reason not to be.

The crime was still a threat, of course. A cruel reminder that even the safest of places aren't foolproof, but it wasn't common. Children weren't afraid of going to school – our worst nightmares lived within the confines of bedtime stories, for the most part. Every time a child went missing or there was a murder or a hit and run, it shook the entire country. Canada is big, enormous even, but it's tight-knit. And like any tight-knit community, tragedy fissured us. Everyone felt it, regardless of where or who you were.

Lucky for us, it didn't happen often. Or at least, it didn't use to.

Seeing your home on the news is not a feeling you will ever get used to. Seeing familiar streets and communities you know well in distress will never get easy. On the 22nd, I woke up to a familiar notification – Shooting. Two dead. A dozen injured. Unfortunately, as a citizen of the United States, it's a headline I've come to know well.

It's when I read where it had taken place that it really hit home. Literally.

I wish I could chalk it up to random, senseless violence. I wish I didn't know the things I know. I wish I could mourn with my community the normal way, without seeing the ways in which this isn't normal.

The ways in which this should never be normal.

Toronto is proof that the direction in which society is going is dangerous. We live in this delusion that if we just pretend that the problem is contained, it will be. If we pretend that it's just an "us problem", us alone will fix it. We rally and protest and we suggest that we have everything under control, but it's bleeding out.

Canada has strict gun control laws. We require background checks and licenses and proof of responsibility. Owning a gun is a process in Canada, a process that most are willing to go through. What's bleeding out isn't just a control problem, it's the mentality. It's our useless solutions and disgusting justifications.

That's what's making it out; that's what's poisoning the water. The pretense that we're setting out.

The reality of our situation is that we're bursting at the seams and we're seeing other countries, other communities getting caught in the crossfire. Our problems are leaking into others' lives and we still have our heads in the sand.

It's not a coincidence; it's not random. Gun violence is no longer a problem that we can attempt to justify. We cannot continue to point fingers and ignore the consequences, because now we are watching what happened to us, happen to others. The way we handle this, the way we choose to handle this, will define us forever.

Canada is safe. Toronto is safe. There shouldn't be people changing the is to was. There shouldn't be parents mourning their children. There shouldn't be this preventable fear and hurt and pain.

The shooting in Toronto is nothing short of a wake-up call. We are setting a dangerous pretense and setting other countries on the same path as us, and it's our responsibility to re-direct the warpath.