We all have that one person we wish we could say those three magic words to, one last time. I Love You. There is so much meaning behind those three simple words. It reassures someone of the love and affection you have towards them. And when someone, who means the absolute world to you, is taken away, and we are unable to say those three words one last time; it hurts deeper than any other injury. I saw the one person I would tell I love you, three weeks before they were gone. Before that it had been about a month before then. I loved this person more than words can even say. That last I love you would go to my grandmother Madeline.

I can't even quite put to words how much one woman has had such a great impact on my life. She was the most caring, hilarious, and honest woman I have ever met. She taught me how to love, respect, and find even in the most dark times, happiness and laughter, since it is the best medicine of all. She was and always will be the coolest person to ever walk to face of the planet. Who is 89 years old, and can get down and dance with her grand kids at their wedding? My grandma did. And in that moment I thought she was invincible, nothing would stop her, she would continue to celebrate birthdays until she got sick. I couldn't believe it. It felt like just yesterday when we were sitting in her kitchen early in the morning sipping on hot tea. Her making me over easy eggs, with toast always cut corner to corner, with lots and lots of butter. I will never forget those late nights we would spend staying up eating cheese and crackers, and endless amounts of rice crispies. I would say to myself I never want to lose this woman. She's my favorite human being on this planet. She loves me unconditionally, no matter how old, bigger, and wiser I get. She's the wisest woman I know, and will ever know. However, I never got to tell her I loved her that one last time, by her bedside.

My freshman year of college was crazy. My sister got married Labor Day weekend, the following weekend my niece was born, and two weeks later I lost my grandma. Everything happened so quick. It was a month of "I Love You", "Congratulations", and "I am sorry for your loss". I was lost for words. I was so overwhelmed with joy for the first half, and then the second half was just filled with sadness. I knew her time was coming. My mom kept telling me Grandma was getting sick and she was going to pass. It's just...I never thought whenever I was telling her how much i loved her and was excited to see her at Katie's wedding that, it was the last time I ever saw and spoke those words to her. Now I am a firm believer in communication beyond death, but not being able to physically see how happy it made Grandma to hear those words and my cheesy smile is what truly breaks my heart.

I carry a little piece of her wherever I go, and I know she guides and helps me through my life now. I would give anything in the world to just have one more conversation, one more breakfast, one last card game, and most of all one last I love you.