To the next person who falls in love with me,

I cannot promise it will be all rainbows and sunshine. I will never promise that.

I am complicated. I am guarded. I get needy. I get anxious. I am super self conscious about myself, but you'd never see that on the outside. I am forgetful about most things. I still think about things I messed up years ago, and I still get upset over some of them. I still think about the things I did wrong to exes that I can never take back. I still even wonder sometimes if I ever had done anything wrong to the one that's cheated on me to cause their actions.

All of my serious relationships (but one) ended in at least some part due to another person catching my partner's interest. All of my serious relationships had me head over heels for the person to the extent where I saw myself staying with them for the rest of my life, but they all ended with me with pieces of my heart missing.

I've been physically and mentally abused, but I never realized it until afterwards. I was made to feel like dirt. I was controlled. I was belittled. My dreams were made fun of. Past relationships got held over my head to make me feel like a horrible person. I was even told my anxiety attacks were unwarranted when I was obviously having them for a reason.

Needless to say, I am a bit damaged. I am wounded. I am cautious. I get scared and worried easily. I try to take things slow, but I fall in love so easily. I fall fast, and I fall so hard the ground cracks below me. It's my curse.

However, I still love like there is no tomorrow. I will be there when no one else is. I will do everything in my power to make sure that you're the happiest you can be, and I promise I learned from my past. With all of the pain and strife that I went through, I'm smarter, stronger, more understanding, more patient, more compassionate, less jealous, less suspicious, less possessive, less demanding... The list goes on.

If I choose you, it's because I see potential in you. I see something special. I see someone worth loving and holding onto until you make it so I can't without hurting myself somehow. I see someone that I may want to spend the rest of my days with. I see someone that makes me happy to be around. I see someone that makes me want to improve myself. I see someone makes me smile, laugh, blush... I see someone worth loving.

I have my limits, but there are few. I'm sure you'll learn them if you haven't already, but I promise to tell you if you've hurt me. I promise to never leave you wondering how I am feeling. I promise to tell you when you've done something wrong. I promise to do my best to make you feel special. I promise to tell you I love you everyday. I promise to always be the person you can go to when no one else will listen, and I promise to help you make your dreams come true as long as it won't hurt me in the process.

Loving me is complicated, but I promise that it's worth it. I will love you until I can't for my own well being. I cannot promise much, but I can promise that.