You don’t know me, and you probably never will, but we all know the same boy. The charmer that you’ve allowed into your life and let down your guard for isn’t the type with which you’ll build a future. Boys like him don’t last months down the line because they get bored too easily—even when the best things are in front of them.

While there’s no reason they would, if our paths were ever to cross, this is what I’d say to you all: When it happens, don’t blame yourself or question why things unraveled the way they did. Don’t attempt to fix what it is that he broke because he will only continue to destroy any bridges you build. He’ll keep you close enough to make you feel special, but far away enough to constantly keep you guessing. If he wants you back, it’ll only be for as long (or as short) as it takes for him to find someone else. Don’t be the girl that helps him pass the time. Realize that he’s playing you—that he’s been playing you. Then, realize that you deserve better, and move on.

It’s far easier said than done, sure. But if you don’t learn to let go, like me, you’ll envy the girls who are able to slip away before they get too attached. You’ll envy the girls who don’t waste as much time as you do and have the strength to move on.

I know how easy it is to fall in love with his words and praise and revel in the rare moments of compassion and chivalry. Good things—good people—are hard to find, so the minute something feels right, we latch onto them out of fear of losing that feeling. It’s a beautifully tragic thing, really—being naïve and emotionally pure enough to trust without reservation.

There are people in this world who have the best intentions and know how to treat others properly. He is not one of those people, and unfortunately, you’ll encounter so many more just like him. But you’re far better than the situation he has placed you in. So don’t miss him; make him miss you. Allow him to understand what it’s like to stand alone. Be smarter, stronger, and more daring than I was and leave before your heart breaks.