To the girl who fears looking up as she is walking,
Me too. I walk to class with my eyes to the ground everyday... because I am insecure. I am afraid to look up because I feel like someone may truly see me. I always say maybe tomorrow I'll walk with my head held high, but I never do. My heart wants to look everyone in the eyes that I pass and exchange smiles. I want to be friendly, I want to be kind, but the voices in my head telling me I am not enough are louder.
I write to you to let you know that you aren't alone. There is someone struggling too. It is a day by day by day battle to lift our heads up along with our hearts. It hurts to be vulnerable and it hurts to let someone know. We feel unapproachable and unwanted as we see all the people passing us. Lies. You are worth it. You are beautiful. You are enough.
So again, I write this to be an encouragement, a cheer on to be bold, and to love who you are. There are more reasons to hold our head high than there are ones for us to look at the ground. The Bible tells us that we are worth more than precious jewels. We are fearfully and wonderfully made. God made us to hold our heads high for His name sake. He wants His creation to be proud that they were made in His image and belong to Him.
I know this isn't a easy thing, to hold your head high, so I wrote out a few daily steps that I am going to begin to take with you as I try to be more confident in who I am and who I was made to be.
Step 1: Spend time in prayer about how you feel about yourself. Ask God to replace lonely feelings with ones of feeling wanted and need or to give you the strength you need everyday to look in the mirror and think positive thoughts.
Step 2: Maybe I'm mostly speaking to myself, I don't know, but take the headphones out and/or keep the phone away. Headphones are the universal sign for don't talk to me and having our phones our has become a crutch (at least for me) to be able to make it to and from places and not be seen.
Step 3: Start by trying to look up occasionally and smile at a few people. Take it in baby steps. Smile. Look away. Relax. Try again.
Step 4: Check out a few verses about your worth and really take them in. Begin to desire to want to live by that standard instead of the world's. Good ones to start with are Psalms 139:13-15, Romans 12:2, and Matthew 6:25-34.
So in the words of Andy Grammer... "But you gotta keep your head up". Own the streets girl. Smile so much. Don't feel like you have to hide your face by looking at the ground. There is a God who loves you and made you to be exactly who you are for a reason.
