There's a phase a lot of young women go through. It's a phase that, looking back, we are not proud of. That my friend is our selfish phase. This phase comes in many forms. It can take a toll on our friendships, relationships with family members, and our love life. I am guilty of every single one. However, I am going to focus primarily on the love life. This week's article is a tribute to the boy I hurt.

Let me preface this by giving all of you men out there a little background on the female train stops. We're born (duh). Then, Disney movies and images of princesses being rescued by handsome men flood our minds and hearts. At such a young age we are told that one day a stud will come riding his big white horse to our doorsteps, and from then on our lives will be perfect. A few years later, we meet a boy. This boy (may or may not be our first love) makes every school day worth living. We hold his hand in the hall, and kiss him before class. Our previous training has taught us that we are to make this BOY happy. We are young, immature and inexperienced. The last thing we want to do is have a fight with the boy that we "love." We then go home and feel angry at him for making us feel a certain way. However, we are more angry at ourselves for not having the guts to stand up to him. "If we fight, he'll dump me. It's two months before prom!!" These are the thoughts that run through our mind. From there we eventually move on and date some more boys, go to more proms, etc. Every girl is different, but eventually we say "NO MORE!" We are tired of feeling that way. Our girlfriends are cheering us on saying motivational things like, "Do you, girl!" "You deserve to think about yourself!" So guess what? We do. While we do this, we have a single girl mentality with a yearning heart. We want a relationship where we don't have to be in the relationship. We want the comfort of knowing you're there, but the freedom to ignore you. So here it is, my letter to you.

I want you to know something. An all time favorite cliche. It's not you, it's me. This phrase couldn't be more true. At this instance, it's important to know this. Anyone who would've fallen into my hole of crap would've experienced the same mistreatment that you did. It wasn't anything you did specifically. I had a mentality that ignored my wrongdoings. I had a magic trick where I could teach myself to erase poor decisions and pretend they didn't happen. You met me when I could've used stability the most, but I chose freedom and spontaneity instead. The mind of a selfish female is a dangerous thing. Many men get a bad rep for this trait, but women do it too. I'm not proud of the person I was, and I'm sorry you were in my line of fire. I hope you learned something from it. I hope you learned your own self-worth, and were able to take that worth and find someone who appreciated it. Even though I was just a kid, being a kid isn't an excuse to only think of oneself. This isn't a phase that lasted forever. My actions caught up to me. If you take away anything from this, let it be that I am aware of my wrongdoings. Know that I grew up, and know that I'm sorry. I'm sorry you experienced me at my worst. I'm sorry for the impression I left. I'm sorry for the hurt I caused. I'm sorry I loved me more.