For the times I felt hopeless due to a mistake, big or small. For the moments that I couldn't handle staring back at my reflection in the mirror because of something I did to upset myself. For the countless hours of being so hard on myself for being so different. For treating others like gold, and treating myself like paper. So easily crumbled into tiny pieces.
To myself, I forgive you.
I forgive you for the times that you believe what the world says about you, rather than God's truth about you. I forgive you for the daily moments of self doubt and curses towards something physical that you can't change. I forgive you for the times that you cannot get everything on your to-do list done in time. No matter how many workouts you skip, or times that you feel anxious instead of hopeful. For every goal unaccomplished. For every time your fear of germs takes over your thinking. I forgive you, I forgive you, I forgive you. Yes, even for that.
I forgive you for your future mistakes. I know that you are going to mess up over and over again. You are going to hurt others without knowing, and it is going to sting so badly watching them turn away. You are going to yell at yourself for letting somebody slip away because you pushed them away with all your might. These mistakes that you have been making your whole life will happen again and again. You can do what you can to prevent hurting yourself and others, but you are imperfect. That's all there is to it. Forgive yourself by remembering that you are going to fail every single day.
So here is to the times of talking yourself into tears. Here is to every second you spend disappointed in yourself over a simple mistake. You are doing what you can. You do not need to have all the answers, and you won't. You don't need to worry so much. You don't need to be so concerned about who society wants you to be. But if you do or you are, I forgive you.
For your past, present, and future. I forgive you.
It's time to spend every second loving who I am and accepting my mistakes. I want to continue growing, and I will. He already took all of my mistakes and sin for me at the cross. I just have to live. I am forgiven. By Him and by me.
