I miss you two more than I could ever express. Losing you both has changed so many aspects of my life and the way I wanted things to be. I wanted you to see me graduate from high school, earn my degree, and get married. I wanted my kids to meet the wonderful women who helped shape me into who I am. But those dreams are long gone and I've accepted that you're just a little farther away when you witness all of these events. I can only imagine what you would think of me today and what you would say to me when I accomplished these things. I hope you're proud of who I'm turning out to be.
All of us that loved you down here miss you, in case you were wondering. We always tell stories about you when we get together and reminisce about the good times when you were around. We try to imagine what life would be like if you were still here with us and how different things could have turned out. I know, I know. Playing the What If game is dangerous and useless. But we can't help but wonder what could have been because so much has changed since your passings that we weren't prepared for.
When I lost you at such young ages, it was heartbreakingly confusing. However, both losses taught me so much. I've learned that you need to cherish the time you have with your grandparents while they're around and if you don't, you will seriously regret it. I've learned that in the darkest times, there are people that will be there to comfort you, who understand what you're going through. And I've learned how loved my grandmothers were by so many people, not just by their children and grandchildren, but by everyone they encountered in life.
If it were possible to send a letter to Heaven, I would send this one to you two angels. I know in my heart that you're looking down at me every day, but I miss being able to see your smiles, speak with you, and get those extra special hugs. There were just so many things I never got a chance to talk to you about and not enough moments where I expressed how much you truly mean to me. So here it is, I hope you get it. I'll see you someday.
