If there is one thing that I've learned throughout my eventful dating life, it's that dating a mother's ONLY son can be one hell of an experience.
The first thing you have to understand is that a lot of times, his mom is struggling with the thought of her son growing up and making his own decisions in life. She's spent his whole life being his guardian, with a tight leash on him to guide him in the right direction. She might not be willing to let go of the boy she once tucked into bed at night. He has always needed her and now that he is ready to pour his heart into a woman he hopes to spend his life with, she may start to panic.
His mom is going to find fault in you every time her son chooses to spend his days with you, when he comes around a little less often, or when things seem to be moving in a more serious direction. She won't want to admit that her son is choosing these things or that he is finally growing and building toward his future and the family he one day hopes to have.
She will need someone to blame and chances are that someone will be you. There are going to be some days where you feel like you just can't win.
There might be days where the man you love stands up for you and puts his foot down. He might draw the line between his mother's place in his life and yours. Some days, he might not. He might be afraid to stand up to a woman that gave him life. Aren't we all?
One of the most important things when dating an only son is to try your best to never make him feel like you're in competition with his mother, even if there are times when she makes you feel that way. Remind him there is room for the kind of love and relationship he has with you and the kind he has for his mother. He should never have to choose.
Life and love are supposed to be balanced between the family that you were born into and the family that you build.
Give it time and you might see a change in the relationship you have with her. Understand her fears and her reasoning, even when it seems bizarre. Her heart yearns for the little boy she raised and until she finally sees him for the man he has become, it will likely be a struggle. Don't let it cut you deeper than it should.
Continue to love her son with every bit of your heart and show him the support he so desperately needs during the time of his life where he fights with himself, who he was, and who he wants to become.
She might come around to the idea of giving her son the space he needs to love another woman...or she might not. Either way, be there to celebrate with him or comfort him. Be the rock he needs and the woman he deserves.
Don't let anyone ruin your heart and put a damper on your love, darling.
Follow Swoon on Instagram.
