To my old friends I once cared about so much,

We all go through that phase where you simply want to be adored and loved by so many people. For me, it was because my life was always changing and I wanted a constant in my life. I felt as if a large group of friends was crucial for me and really gave me the comfort I was constantly searching for. These people whom I referred to as my "best friends" were apart of some of the best moments of my life so far. I don't know if it was because it was the time we shared together, or if it was because it felt so nice to be wanted by a big group of people. If I was happy with new events and people, or if I was filling a void I once had. I didn't know if it was the lack of school time and the abundance of summer sunshine and feeling so liberated. I still, to this day, cannot decipher which one it was.

All I know is that it was a time in my life where I felt rich with happiness and as if there was no boundaries in this life, that anything in this world was possible. I always knew in the back of my mind that it wasn’t going to last forever and I came to terms with that. Not everyone is meant to stay in your life. Some people are meant to stay forever, through the good and bad, but some people leave and those people left. As the seasons changed, so did we, so did life, so did opportunities, so did everything else and it would always be that way. What you once believed got washed up, like a pair of forgotten flip flops on the sandy shore.

Things really did change for all of us, extremely. Some of us continued down the same path we once were on all together, some went to college, some just simply got lost with the time. We all did our own thing. We did what naive kids are supposed to do with more ambition and dreams than we could carry. I guess I can genuinely say I miss all of these people I was blessed enough to call my friends at one point. I miss the way they would think, their spontaneous road trips, and their unique views on the world. Sometimes I catch myself missing the adventures, late night sneaking out, etc. I miss having people to go to while living in this plastic town full of high expectations and people who care too much about everything.

I catch myself missing those people I shared those breathtakingly amazing memories with, but, realistically I don’t even think I spent enough time with them to call them “best friends” or much less, family. Today, I don’t even need a full hand to count the amount of best friends I have, and that’s the way it should be. Hold on to the people who you can not only laugh till you cry with, but you can also count on with your deepest and darkest secrets. Hold onto the people who know how you’re feeling before you even know how you feel. Best friends aren’t a replaceable pair of flip flops that can easily get washed away on the beach. Your best friends are a pair of Louboutins that are so precious, you keep them your whole life.

I still run into these people from time to time. Most of them still believe the world is a pure place and they are still full of spontaneous ideas. I could still see them at a party and greet them with open arms. Just because things have changed it doesn’t mean they are for the better or worse, just different.