Is it so wrong to have no desire to have children? I mean I understand if you would like to procreate. Adding to the already increasingly high population of human beings that have conquered this Earth simply because it is "in our nature" or because it is "the reason we were put onto this Earth?"
Or maybe your purpose for procreation is to have another individual for whom you yourself care for many years, who will return the favor in your older age. Maybe your justification is simply because you want a little version of yourself and the person you love, a true testament to your relationship and commitment to one another?
Or maybe, just maybe, it is because there is a socially constructed norm, and if you don't have your own children you either physically cannot or you are nothing but a loser who found no one to care for you enough to bear a child with you. You'll become the crazy cat lady if you don't, right?
But what happens when you have no desire to bear a child in your body? When you perceive "the most natural thing in the world" to actually be almost alien-like? What if the thought of something inside of you, kicking its way through your stomach actually scares the sh*t out of you? Is it wrong that when scrolling on Instagram and spontaneously crossing paths with a video of a life-birth, you scream out loud in your bedroom with no one in close proximity to hear you?
By no means am I attempting to downplay the love and affection that a mother feels when her child is in the womb. But what if I just don't feel the way that you're "supposed to feel about it?" In the 19 years of my life I may have not learned much. My opinion on things may change quite frequently, dependent on the day of the week, class I'm taking, or even (ignorantly) something I saw on social media. But something I believe will remain constant is my perception that someone does not deserve to bear a child simply because it is "in our nature" or the norm.
The only event in which an individual should choose to have a child is when that person believes that they can put another human being's life before their own. To protect them, even at the cost of their own safety. To support, love and sacrifice simply because it makes you happy. No matter where my life takes me I believe that my perception of this idea will remain constant. Maybe one day my life will bring me to a place where I desire to have a child.
A part of myself will look back on this article and laugh about how ridiculously disgusted I was by even the mere thought of having a child. However, I know that I will not regret my words because in them is my contingency. And I hope that if I do have a child one day, my contingency will be a reminder to always put the child before myself.
