It wasn’t too long ago that I was staring at my computer screen waiting to open your letters. It wasn’t too long ago that I was eager with excitement, anxiously waiting to make one of you my new home. It wasn’t too long ago that, for the first time, I felt like all my years of AP classes, SAT prep, and extracurriculars were about to pay off – that you were somehow going to validate every choice I ever made. A year ago, I was certain that one of you would add my name to your newest class. If I loved you, then you must have loved me too, right?
But you all said “no." Every last one of you. And that “no” held more weight than you could ever imagine. Your “no” implied that I wasn’t good enough. It implied that I didn’t have what it takes to be successful in your classes. It implied that my accomplishments, my dreams, and simply who I am as an individual didn’t stand out enough to make me a valuable addition to your student body.
For the longest time, I believed you. I let you push me to tears many nights when I got into bed. I wondered why I worked so hard just to give you the chance to tell me that my best was never good enough. I questioned why, a few months earlier, I was so sure that my future would lead me to one of you, when you knew all along that I wasn’t for you. I let you define me. I let you destroy me – almost.
It took months for me to move on from your rejection and even longer for me to stop wishing that I had done everything differently. But I soon realized something that helped me put everything into perspective: It only takes one “yes” to change a life. For me, that “yes” came from a school that, while amazing, I never really saw in my future. That “yes” came from a school that was so different from the mold in which I grew up. That “yes” came from a school that pushed me so far out of my comfort zone. But, it was a “yes” nonetheless – more than you could offer me – so I promised myself that I would give it a fair chance.
And after one full semester at school, I can honestly say that I could not be more grateful that you all said “no” one year ago. Your rejections pushed me to further challenge myself in my academics. They pushed me to try things that I never thought I would. (Who would have ever thought that I’d be in a sorority or be a writer for Odyssey?) They pushed me to start the journey of finding myself. And for all of this, they made me stronger.
So to all the schools that said “no," thank you. Thank you for teaching me to pick myself up when I fall. Thank you for helping me discover my passions. Thank you for introducing me to my best friends, the ones I will never be able to live without. Thank you for leading me to happiness. Thank you for leading me home.
And to all of you who are applying to schools now and don’t get into your top choice, I can honestly tell you that it will be OK – better than OK. It may just end up being the best thing that’s ever happened to you.
