Each year on my birthday, I always look back on my major accomplishments and create new goals for what I hope to achieve in the upcoming twelve months of my life. After celebrating the biggest birthday I've had since birth ~my 21st~ I have realized how much I've changed in just the last short months before it alone.
Right before my birthday this year, an unexpected turn in life caused me to have to rethink everything that I had planned. This change put me through a season of depression as I felt helpless and unworthy, stuck at home alone for days. If not for the love and support from my family and friends, and a change that I knew needed to come in my life, I don't think I'd have been motivated enough to continue forward. But after reevaluating my life this time, here are some key changes that have impacted my life the most.
1. I’ve taken time to focus on myself.
What this means differs from day to day, but on the regular for me, it means just being mindful of my mental and physical health. This helps me eliminate unnecessary stressors because I’m no longer worried about always making everyone happy before myself. I quickly learned that I wouldn’t be looked at as rude or unkind just because I say no, and the moment I did I felt a great relief.
On other days, it’s a lot more than just being mindful of my choices. I had to learn how to sensibly balance not spending any money on myself and treating myself like I just won the lottery because no matter how old we get it’s always nice to reward yourself. I have rerouted my brain to stop feeling guilty each time I want to buy a new outfit or spend a day out with my friends. This has changed how I view money in relation to myself and my needs which has greatly improved my quality of life.
2. I actively seek to spend time with my friends.
After switching jobs this year, I lost my constant contact with ninety-percent of my friend group. This took a major toll on me and was the cause of much of my sadness. I’ve always been bad at keeping up with friends from school or old jobs once I had left those places, but with my new change in perspective, I knew that would not be the case here.
I now look forward to our coincided days off because I can enjoy my friends in an out-of-work environment and we can actually do exciting things. By actively seeking out time to meet with my close friends, I understand who I actually enjoy the company of and who I used to just tolerate because I had to see them daily.
3. I have started to love myself, and accept love from my friends and family.
It is a long and difficult journey to be at peace with who you are and accept yourself just the same. It took me years to finally surround myself with positive people who I feel never judge me for being myself and truly want the best for me. But now that I finally understand my support system and feel comfortable falling back on them when I need to, I feel confident in my ability to succeed and grow.
The amazing love and support from all my friends and family are how I got out of my slump this year, and without a doubt, I know they will continue to be there for the hardest times of my life. Their constant encouragement and advice make me feel like I have the ability to take on the world head on and achieve any goal I set my mind to.
Change can be a wonderful thing, and although sometimes unexpected, you never know if it can be the best thing to happen in your life. If I was never shifted out of my comfort zone, I don’t think my outlook on life and relationships would have changed. So with that said, I encourage you to embrace the changes in your life with open arms, I know you won’t regret it.
