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20 Rules You Must Obey When You See Your Tinder Match IRL, Or #RIP Your Social Life

Whatever you do, don't eat a banana.

Amber F. Armstrong

Jul 29, 2018

Western Washington University

2998

20 Rules You Must Obey When You See Your Tinder Match IRL, Or #RIP Your Social Life

https://unsplash.com/photos/zHsLOlZgqmM

So about three weeks ago, I was finishing up an article where I asked 15 guys on Tinder "DTF?" Yes, it was all fun and games, until I saw one of my matches sitting about five feet away from me. I should've just left the room (this is my last rule on this list). I was laughing, staring, looking at his profile, and this was all directed to my best friend who was sat directly in front of me. She told me to STFU and just keep calm because he most likely didn't recognize me (rude, but true).

I deleted my account straight after this incident because how the heck could I handle this again?

To keep you from humiliating yourself any further than you already have (we both know it's true), here are 20 things you should 110% NOT do if you come in contact with the same situation as I did. Good luck my "Tinderees":

1. Stare at them for more than 0.00009 seconds.

2. Whisper sweet nothings into their ear (IDK how you would feel this comfortable with a hot stranger, but to each their own).

3. Pull up their profile and ask if that’s really their dog.

4. Laugh uncontrollably until the whole room is as uncomfortable as you are.

5. Send a picture of them to themselves with the caption, “Cutie spotted.”

6. Send them a “what you up to?” text because you know damn well what they’re up to.

7. Send them the, “How you doin’?” Joey GIF and stare at them until they look at their phone.

8. Slick back or whip your hair to the side… stop, they already swiped right so they already think you’re hot, why try too hard?

9. Walk past them five times and keeping making it obvious asf.

10. Wink… because no one wants to see that.

11. Spill coffee on their desk to get them to notice you (you may ruin their homework and then that “almost relationship” has already gone to sh*t).

12. Dab their direction. Actually, just don’t do this in general #YoureWelcome.

13. Eat a BANANANANANA (don't judge, you are thinking it too).

14. Lick a lollipop.

15. Do a squat or push up (for all the gym rats out there).

16. Snap your BFF a picture of your hottie with a body.

17. Slide under the table (I have contemplated this one).

18. Ask how their trip to Las Vegas was back in 2013 (Facebook stalking at 3am should be kept private).

19. Start playing their Tinder anthem out loud... I think they'll notice, sweetie.

20. Finally, I would just get TF out of there but leave your dignity and take your regret with you.

If a majority of the above has already happened to you, I recommend not giving a sh*t and do whatever you want. The relationship is already gone. Maybe unmatch if they haven't already.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Recommended for you

20 Rules You Must Obey When You See Your Tinder Match IRL, Or #RIP Your Social Life

Whatever you do, don't eat a banana.

1. Stare at them for more than 0.00009 seconds.

2. Whisper sweet nothings into their ear (IDK how you would feel this comfortable with a hot stranger, but to each their own).

3. Pull up their profile and ask if that’s really their dog.

4. Laugh uncontrollably until the whole room is as uncomfortable as you are.

5. Send a picture of them to themselves with the caption, “Cutie spotted.”

6. Send them a “what you up to?” text because you know damn well what they’re up to.

7. Send them the, “How you doin’?” Joey GIF and stare at them until they look at their phone.

8. Slick back or whip your hair to the side… stop, they already swiped right so they already think you’re hot, why try too hard?

9. Walk past them five times and keeping making it obvious asf.

10. Wink… because no one wants to see that.

11. Spill coffee on their desk to get them to notice you (you may ruin their homework and then that “almost relationship” has already gone to sh*t).

12. Dab their direction. Actually, just don’t do this in general #YoureWelcome.

13. Eat a BANANANANANA (don't judge, you are thinking it too).

14. Lick a lollipop.

15. Do a squat or push up (for all the gym rats out there).

16. Snap your BFF a picture of your hottie with a body.

17. Slide under the table (I have contemplated this one).

18. Ask how their trip to Las Vegas was back in 2013 (Facebook stalking at 3am should be kept private).

19. Start playing their Tinder anthem out loud... I think they'll notice, sweetie.

20. Finally, I would just get TF out of there but leave your dignity and take your regret with you.

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There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

It's mandatory to have these conversations.

1. What do you do for a living?

2. What's your favorite color?

3. Do you have any siblings?

4. What's your favorite television show?

5. When is your birthday?

6. What's your biggest goal in life?

7. If you had three wishes granted to you by a genie, what would they be?

8. What's your favorite childhood memory?

9. If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?

10. Are you a cat or a dog person?

11. Do you believe in a religion or any sort of spiritual power?

12. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be?

13. What is your ideal date night?

14. Who was/is your celebrity crush?

15. What's a good way to cheer you up if you're having a bad day?

16. Do you have any tattoos?

17. Can you describe yourself in three words?

18. What makes you the most nervous in life?

19. What's the best gift you have ever received?

20. What do you do to relax/have fun?

21. What are your priorities at this phase of your life?

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

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