Chivalry is dead, but it is fiction that something as simplistic and innocent as feminism is the culprit behind this new-age rejection of old-fashioned dating etiquette. Feminism is the scapegoat millennials point to instead of addressing Americans' blatant disinterest in monogamous relationships and traditional long-term dating.

In fact, it makes little sense to blame feminism for precluding chivalry when the two can exist comfortably together. A chivalrous act — such as a male opening a door for a female — is not spitefully done with the aim of defacing women of their worth or done so pretentiously to tell her she is not capable of doing such a menial task; think of this faulty logic. Chivalry is nothing but a gift of thoughtfulness in recognition of a special someone. Chivalry in its most reductive form is kindness, and accepting kindness does not degrade an individual by any stretch of the imagination. If that were the case, then women would not accept a bouquet of flowers on Valentine’s Day, or men birthday gifts under the premise that gift-giving is “insulting” and accepting kindness compromises individualism and creates the grounds for a submissive relationship.

Accepting acts of chivalry essentially celebrates respect. The receiver of the act is evidently a purported equal if he or she is deserving of such decent treatment. It is when we treat others poorly that we exhibit an air of superiority and the foundation of inequality is set. The most gruesome cases of inequality — think the treatment of Jews in Hitler Germany — exists when purported “superiors” treat individuals believed to be below them disdainfully, and not with decency and respect. Hence, chivalry does not cause injury to women; conversely, it casts women in an advanced position of equality by creating high standards of which to be treated by the opposite sex.

So let’s set the record straight: chivalry is not dead because of feminism — the real offender is our current hookup culture, which has been popularized by mainstream media glorifying one-night stands and dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, and OkCupid. Chivalry cannot plausibly co-exist with this modern culture because it is outdated in the sense that it requires a degree of monogamy, time investment, commitment, and romance. Hookup apps like Tinder have made “speed dating” outpace traditional dating, causing relationships to go from zero to 100 in one date. This phenomenon, coupled with the availability of multiple partners, has eliminated chivalry as a code of conduct because sex is the only motive and a male expectation that women are feeding into. College campuses are a breeding ground for these types of behaviors. Frat stars are lauded as “real men” for the amount of partners they conquer, and more so if they do this conquering with as little effort as humanly possible.

This new-age culture is not liberating for women, nor is it making them sexually equal or “independent”; rather, this culture is sexist by design because men act as though they are entitled to women who are commodified as sexual prizes. It is time for women to regain respect in our dating lives and not to concede to societal norms; we must reclaim old-time dating values and the respect we deserve.