Winter sucks. I know. There are few things I hate more than having to go outside during those really freezing days in winter. Sometimes it can be so cold your ears feel like they are going to fall off, and the traction on your snow boots is no match for the ice covering the sidewalks. I have fallen on my butt at least once each winter since coming to Eastern. So far this winter hasn’t been too disgustingly frigid and nobody has lost any fingers to frostbite yet, but January and February in Illinois are known to be quite brutal. It is only a matter of time before we get those negative two degree days or the heavy snowfalls or the howling winds. Quite frankly, I’m not ready for those days to come, so I’m trying to cope with the quickly approaching doom of winter with some comedic thoughts I have had while walking to class in the winter.

1. Should I skip today? I really shouldn’t skip classes and I already missed that nine am once this month. But the weather app says it is zero degrees outside and snowing and there is also black ice which is dangerous to my physical health, so for my well being I should probably just skip and stay in my nice warm bed. Yeah, that is a great idea.

2. Oh wow, the snow is beautiful. When I look out the window at it while standing in my heated home.

3. Dang it, the driveway isn’t shoveled. Now I have to walk through this snow and it’s going to stay stuck on the bottom of my boots and melt throughout class and leave gross, dirty water all over the floor. Sorry janitors.

4. Why do I live in a place where my face hurts when I walk outside?

5. This is zero degrees? This feels like negative fifty! Curse you wind chill!

6. I’m only at the corner of the street now? I’ve still got, like, six minutes of walking!

7. Why is campus not indoors? Or have heated underground tunnels? That would make things so much nicer.

8. It started to snow? Oh, that's nice.

9. Snow... Like Jon Snow. It snowed all the time where he lived. Just channel your inner Jon Snow and suck it up.

10. Why has nobody invented a way to teleport yet? Seriously? It is 2017 people, why is this not a thing yet? Think of all the freezing college students!

11. Is there a way around this slush? No? Okay… Ew, ew, ew!

12. I’m so close, just another minute.

13. Is it normal for my fingers to feel numb? Or my ears? Can I still hear if my ears fall off? Can I get a doctor's note to skip class if my ears fall off?

14. I wonder how red my cheeks are?

15. I made it! At least heating has been invented. Still waiting for someone to make teleportation a thing.

16. I have to do this all over again when I walk home…