This weekend I traveled all the way from our little Appleton, Wisconsin to Syracuse, New York to see family. As I was going about my traveling on the way here, my first time flying all by my lonesome, there were more than a few interesting things going on in my head as well as around me. In chronological order, these are what I was thinking during my approximately six-and-a-half hours spent at three airports and on two planes. I feel like others may share many of my sentiments.
1. This security worker is extremely efficient. I feel like I should be taking my shoes off faster.
2. This airport is tiny. Poor woman, she's the only one working at the only place selling food here.
3. Am I in the wrong seat? Is there supposed to be no one sitting next to me?
4. Oops, sorry good sir. I am in the wrong seat.
5. This flight is hilariously short. Appleton to Chicago- who knew?
6. Yes, I love landing with just one wheel on the grand and then smashing onto the other one. Very pleasant.
7. Sir, you don't have to stand up yet. You'll get off the plane with the rest of us.
8. Man, I am great at dodging people while pulling a suitcase.
9. There's no way those are carry-on regulation sized bags, ma'am.
10. I feel like this isn't a conversation to have in line for the bathroom at the airport.
11. I applaud that woman for looking put together, because I look absolutely horrible right now.
12. I think that is the sixth Starbucks I have passed just walking to my gate.
13. This is a very fancy airport. Lots of windows.
14. Is that a large statue of a dinosaur?
15. Wow this cart is beeping very loudly and obviously needs desperately to be let through.
16. I'm very hungry. Where can I get lunch? I think I passed all the good places.
17. Should I go to Starbucks?
18. I'm gonna go to Starbucks.
19. This line is very long. What size do i want?
20. What size? Oh, no, it's the.... UMMMM.... tall, I guess.
21. This wi-fi is atrocious.
22. I should be doing so much more work than I am right now.
23. There are so many crying children here.
24. That child is much too small to have his own suitcase.
25. Why are there still pay phones here? Shoot, I knocked a pay phone out of its cradle.
26. This aisle is too small for your suitcase, yes. Please don't try again.
27. Babies shouldn't be allowed on planes.
28. My mom says I was a delightful baby to fly with. Why can't all babies be like me?
29. Wow--everyone is very close to me outside this gate.
30. They need more charging stations.
31. I look like an idiot laughing to myself to this podcast.
32. Why isn't the wi-fi working?
33. Finally we're boarding.
34. God, I hope my bag fits in the overhead bin.
35. Out of my way--I need to get to an overhead bin.
26. OK, out of the aisle, please. I need to get through.
27. Yikes! Almost hit someone with my backpack.
28. Is no one sitting next to me?
29. Oh, a pilot is sitting next to me. Do they get nervous flying? Probably not.
30. What is that phone game he's playing, I should get it.
31. It's cold in here.
32. I've had so much caffeine today and now I have to sit down for two hours.
33. Time to get work done... maybe.
34. I don't want to be that person who takes out my five pound art history textbook.
35. I hope there are no crying children on this plane.
36. What's the time change to New York?
37. There's a pilot sitting next to me. I should look engaged in the safety presentation.3
8. These seat belts are kind of the worst. Sure, I'm safe, but at what cost to my comfort? (Just kidding).
39. I hope I never have to use one of those masks on a plane.
40. These headphones don't go loud enough to drown out the plane noise.
41. I have to cough but I don't want to be that person.
42. There are so many planes in front of us. It's such a straight line- like Madeline!
43. What happened to SkyMall? I miss that.
44. Flying while congested is one of the worst feelings ever.
45. The guy next to me is watching "Forrest Gump." I approve of your movie choice, sir.
