We all know snow is a magical mystery to those who live in the south. It is the occasional joy of a winter wonderland that northerners may take for granted. The rush to grab bread and milk at the eve of a winter storm is a tradition that rivals Black Friday. You pray the storm hits Thursday night and continues through Friday. Even better, a Sunday night winter apocalypse to eliminate the dreadful Monday syndrome you experience every week. What happens in your mind when planning for a snow day seems too good to be true. Often times, it is. This is the classic case of “expectations vs. reality.” Here is what actually happens on a rare southern snow day.
1. Waiting late at night for the email or call of school/work being closed:
You know it’s going to come, but campus police waits until last minute to prevent the parties… that are already happening.
2. Meanwhile, everyone raise in the south repeats that there is a 90 percent chance nothing will happen.
You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.
3. When the email finally comes, you can hear simultaneous cheering everywhere:
The cheering heard around the world. Glasses raised, music blaring, and a lot of happy dancing -- let the winter celebrations begin.
You get really excited you can’t wait for morning! Well, after the celebrations.
5. After partying until 2 a.m., you decide that sleeping in is the best option.
There is something extremely satisfying about not having to get up at 7 a.m. for classes. The only downside is half of the day is gone. It might be noon and your eyes may be half open, but the fun is just beginning!
6. You and your roommates plan your day around food. Eating all day sounds great!
There’s nothing like waking up the rest of your roommates with the sound of sizzling and the smell of crispy bacon. Toast, buttered and smothered with jam, sunny-side up eggs, and a glass of orange juice (most likely saved from your last trip to the dining hall). Mimosas optional.
7. Realizing your entire plans consisted of food, but now that you are all full you don’t know what to do:
Well, eating was fun… but what now?
8. Planning and failing to complete item #5 on “Snow day to-do list” -- the roommate gym date.
It’s exciting when all of your roommates, including the one voted “least likely to be seen near a treadmill,” agree to go to the gym together. Just as you’re all dressed in your finest athletic wear, you realize the roads are too unsafe and walking in a blizzard is not a desirable option.
9. Working out and stretching in the comfort of your warm apartment:
Three out of four roommates comfortably complete a full abdominal workout in front of the TV. Meanwhile, the least productive roommate is on the couch “supervising” and watching "Harry Potter" on ABC Family (now known as Freeform).
10. Putting on layers and layers to finally go outside:
Your first experience of the “winter wonderland” is a trip to the dumpsters. You and your roommate bundle, trash bags and empty pizza boxes in hand, and exit into the world of Jack Frost. Suddenly, you realize the wonderland is more of an Antarctic expedition. Using the penguin buddy system was definitely the best option because, after about five minutes of freezing air and ice pelting your exposed cheeks and hands, you’re certain frostbite has begun and you won’t make it back to the room.
11. The realization that it’s 6 p.m., you’re hungry again, and you’ve done nothing all day except sit on the couch, wrapped in a warm blanket.
It seems you’re only destined to eat and avoid the outside world as much as possible. Nothing on the to-do list was accomplished, aside from any and all meal and snack times.
12. Even though you’re productively fun plans fell through, hibernating with friends is ultimately a great way to spend a rare snowy day in the south.
If you pray, put a spoon under your bed, and wear your pajamas inside out, there's always a chance for another snow day to do all of the things you may end up not doing again.