I have been an official college student for nearly 2 months. Typing out the words “college student” still seems weird to me, like I am about to tell the story of someone with more life experience and general knowledge. I am 18 years old, living alone for the first time in my life, I can promise you I have no idea what I am doing. I had such high expectations for my freshman year, which I can honestly say were provoked by my immense love of shows like Greek and Gilmore girls. They make college seem like a constant party, and that you are pretty much guaranteed to have a “whirlwind romance” the second you step through the gates.
In reality, you are bombarded with more work than you can imagine and homesickness is something that slowly starts to eat you alive. The first week of college, I remember being distinctly aware of how much fun everyone else seemed to be having at other colleges. Their constant social media updates with nothing but smiles and alcohol made my experience seem dull in comparison. What I didn’t stop to consider was how these people wanted to be perceived. Of course, they wanted to look they were having a great time!
That’s half the appeal of college, isn’t it? The initial “freedom” from the way your life used to be. I needed to learn to not be so quick to assume that just because someone posed for a picture with a smile, it doesn’t mean they weren’t feeling the same way I was. You change quickly in a short amount of time, meeting new people and dealing with the stress of school, all while being in a new environment. I had never even been to a sleep away camp before; the longest time I was away was for 3 weeks during a community service trip nearly 2 summers ago.
Even during that time, however, I had familiar faces close by. I went on that trip with one of my best friends, it’s strange to now have to come to a new environment and practically start from scratch. Making new friends is something that I can’t say comes easily to me. I am a shy person by nature and have stayed close with the small group that I was friends with in middle school. It’s been hard knowing that they are off making new memories with people that I don’t know. However, I know that they will always be there for me; the friendship I share with them is one that I hope gets stronger as we get older. Being in college is a weird feeling.
There so much build- up to it with applications, testing and even buying dorm room supplies that it feels surreal to actual be in the position to say that you are in college. Through the tough transition, I relied on my family and friends from home, to remind me how lucky I am to even have the opportunity to attend a university outside of my home state. I miss my old life, of course. However, I am starting to now realize how much potential my future holds. That thought is exciting and scary; I can’t wait to see where I end up at the end of these four years. I am excited to see what lessons stuck will with me the most, the friends that I made and the memories that will last a lifetime.
