These are just a few instances, thoughts you may have come across or even thought of. Lets be honest...We have all thought about it, who are we kidding!
1. When a squirrel crosses in front of your car, at least part of you kinda wants to hit it. Just to see if you can. And because it kinda deserves it for running in front of you in the first place.
2. Someone announces on Facebook that they're starting some new diet or weight loss plan and in your mind you're like "Mmmmhmm. Okay."
3. You see a cute stranger, notice they're wearing a wedding ring, and briefly wonder if they're happy or, like, maybe going to get divorced soon.
4. "That's an ugly baby. A very ugly baby. It will be an ugly adult and have a miserable life. Sorry boutcha baby."
5. Some totally irresponsible acquaintance announces their pregnancy and you immediately panic for that child's well being.
6. Similarly, you see an engagement announcement on Facebook and immediately start guessing how long until they divorce (or assume they'll never actually get married all.) Hmm.
7. When you see an ex's new significant other on Instagram and realize you're way more attractive than they are, thus confirming that your ex will do better than you and will suffer with the painful regret of losing you.
8. When a homeless person asks you for change and you say you don't have any but in fact you totally do.
9. When you see a really overweight person eating something unhealthy and instinctively judge them before you can remind yourself that you shouldn't.
10. When you intentionally decide not to text someone back for a few days to make them feel a little insecure and establish the emotional upper hand.
11. "UGH, maybe I should just marry for money. I hate everyone anyway, and not working sounds pretty great."