1. "Are all these spray tans killing any brain cells?"

2. "So if I go out tonight but stay in one night next week to do homework, that evens out, right?"

3. "Would my landlord even find out if I got a puppy?"

4. "If i get my nails done, will I have the funds to get them done again in three weeks?"

5. "My ex is passing... am I going to say hi? Maybe we will let him say hi first.. He's passing... ok silence works too. It's fine"

6. "If I have to clean up after my roommate one more time, I would rather live on the street."

7. "If I get hit by a car, will I really get free tuition?"

8. "Honestly, I'm going for medical school. Grey's anatomy is actually so inspiring."

9. "Since I've already watched Grey's twice and Orange is the New Black four times, should I do homework or watch Grey's again?"

10. "Can I take a nap in eleven and a half minutes?"

11. "So if I go to sleep in 3 minutes, will I get enough sleep to get no sleep tomorrow night?"

12. "Since I'm eating a salad for lunch, I get cookies for dinner."

13. "If I make another Facebook, will tobi give me 70% off again?"

14. "Why is she wearing a crop top to class? Why is she wearing wedges to class? Why is she wearing those short shorts to class?"

15. "If I double insta today, can I insta again tomorrow?"

16. "Why isn't my mom answering the text I sent her? It sent four minutes ago."

17. "Where is the knife emoji?"

18. "lemme google these Drake lyrics to go under my picture I posted with my friends."

19. "What does Drizzy mean?"

20. "I wonder if I can just sleep in this makeup and wear it again tomorrow."

21. " If I go to the gym tomorrow, I'll be covered for the next two weeks for sure."

22. "What if I honestly die in this spin class?"

23. "No parents, no rules."

24. "Heels in grass won't be that bad."

25. "HEELS IN GRASS IS HONESTLY A HAZARD. WHY DIDN'T THEY COME WITH A WARNING LABEL. MY ANKLES MIGHT NEVER WORK AGAIN AFTER THIS."

26. "I wonder who will make my 21st birthday neck sign."

27. "If I drink soda, but drink the same amount of water... I learned this in chemistry I think... it should dilute and it will only be half the calories... right? hype."

28. "my phone is on one percent. I lost my friends. Walking alone. I've heard girls like you don't make it out alive.... run.. ok don't run you're in heels."

29. "Can I change my major even though I'm a junior... because the animal science people get to play with cows."

30. "If I look at the clock will my professor notice... maybe I'll just.. no wait I think the syllabus said no phones... ok pretend to look at the powerpoint and... 21 minutes left of class."

31. "Did i honestly fall down the stairs last night.. if like 400 people were there only maybe 10 people saw it though.. right?"

32. "What is this bruise from?"

33. "I should just start braiding my leg hairs now."

34. "Did I even put on deodorant today?" *Sniffs armpit*

35. "I'm going to be so late to class but I don't think I can risk the public embarrassment of running and my book bag bouncing on my back right now."