On any given night out, there is always one friend who is given the illustrious job of being the Designated Driver. You and your friends head to the pregame and you've decided to swap tequila shots for car keys for one night, and suddenly the night ahead seems longer than that night class you barely stayed awake for. You know it's not going to be the wildest night you've ever had, but maybe you have a huge project to finish the next day. Or you're still nursing your hangover from the night before. Whatever the reason, we've all been there. Here are some thoughts we've all had when we're the DD.
Before you go out
1. One whole night of being sober ahead of me.
I can still have fun. I am totally capable of having fun.
2. Ugh, they pulled out the vodka already.
Why did I decide to do this again?
3. (Five minutes later.) She's had six shots already?
4. She will undoubtedly be spending a lot of QT with the toilet, later.
5. Wow, do we always play the music this loud?
6. Should I even bother wasting a good outfit on this night?
7. She took another shot?
8. This already isn't fun and we haven't even left the house, yet.
9. (Stares down vodka bottle for five straight minutes hoping no one notices.)
10. If we don't leave this house soon, I'll down five shots and call an Uber.
#noragrets.
At the pre-game
1. OK, even more drunk people. I can totally handle this.
(Takes four deep breaths.)
2. Oh, great now they're playing flip cup.
They all suck. I should be playing.
3. I've never had more regret in my entire life.
4. I am a flip cup champion. How am I not playing?
5. I could single-handedly defeat all of them.
Drunken fools.
6. At least there's good music playing.
That's a solid four minute distraction.
7. A full keg? Really?
Who did this to me? Did they know I was driving and wanted me to suffer?
8. My Snapchat story is going to be long.
Am I this embarrassing on a regular basis?
9. I'm probably more embarrassing than this. Yikes!
10. Another round of flip cup?
This night is never ending.
At the bar
1. I hope it's more than just the vodka talking, because my friends really seem to love me.
2. Maybe this night isn't so bad after all.
There's so much love.
3. Somebody is going to fall tonight and it is not going to be me!
4. Who am I kidding?
It'll probably still be me.
5. Making friends in the bathroom is fun when you're drunk or sober.
I need to remember that.
6. I'm saving money tonight. That's a plus!
7. I'm gonna feel great in the morning.
(Repeats to self 100 times.)
8. Is that really worth it, though?
I've gone to work, done homework, driven home, done any other activity hungover too many times to count. What's one more day?
9. No. No. No. I can do this!
I'm strong and responsible and can handle this.
10. Somebody else will totally drive next week, right? Right?
