Sitting in my journalism class at 10:35 am, I'm filled with a sense of panic and confusion. Everyone in the class seems to have a pretty good handle on what being a journalist is, and why they also want to be one. Everyone seems to have experience either writing for the school newspaper or running a show on the TV station or even running a sports-centered blog on the internet.
And then there's me.
I purposely picked Mass Communications as my major because I knew it left my options open. But I take a lot of journalism classes because of my major, and when I'm asked, "why do you want to be a journalist?" My only answer is I don't really think I want to be one. And when I'm asked what do I want to, it gets even more complicated.
I wish I could be like everyone else. Or at least, how I view everyone else. They're doing internships and joining business fraternities. They're working part-time jobs related to their major, and they have five-year plans. They want to move to big cities or go on to graduate school. They're planning and preparing for their future, and sometimes I feel like I'm just being pulled along with the current.
It's so easy to compare myself to others. Everyone seems to have themselves somewhat together, and I'm not really sure what I want to do. I've never had one set dream job. I don't have a five-year plan. Even when people ask if I plan on staying in South Carolina or moving back home after college, I'm at a lost. There are so many amazing routes I could take, I'm not really sure which one is right for me.
Although I panic almost every day because I don't know what I want, I'm excited that I have so many options. I'm excited that the world is my oyster and there are so many different possibilities out there for me. I and everyone who feels total panic thinking about the future need to relax and remember that everything works out the way it's supposed to. It's so easy to just want to get to the end, where I know what job I have, where I live, and who I'm living with. But ultimately, I know the journey that gets me there is one of the best parts.