After spending countless days and nights with my brother in the hospital, I've decided to reveal what really goes behind those revolving and handicap accessible doors. If you've ever been in a hospital, I'm sure you can relate. Hopefully, none of you will have to live in a hospital or go through this, but if you enjoy reading this, don't forget to share it!
So, first you will meet a lady (yes, it's usually a lady... no comment) behind a desk who will admit you into the hospital. She will smile at you (if it's between the hours of 7:00am and 12:00pm), and after that it will be all downhill from there... It's the curse of her smile!
Once you're admitted, your curiosity will begin to question everyone around you – why are they in the hospital? Do they have what I have?
You will then realize that you are at the mercy of a doctor who hasn't come in to see you (and quite possibly never will). And so you will leave your room on a manhunt to find your doctor and give them a piece of your mind.
Once you find your doctor, it will take another 5 hours (minimum!) for the doctor to make any progress on deciding what your next steps should be. Or maybe the doctor will have just left for the day and forget to tell you.
About then, a nurse will in to get blood and urine from you because... OMG! The nurses are vampires!
You will then get a room and begin to fall into the hospital routine. You will be woken up at 6:30am to have your vitals checked. This is done because if the nurses have to wake up at 6:30am, you should suffer too.
Then the boredom will kick in. You will be bored ALL. DAY. LONG.
Your boredom will cause you to eat a lot. You will then realize that you can't just go to the gym. You will regret having broken your diet.
You will start doing random activities to make time pass.
You will wonder what the rest of the world is up to, but all you will be able to hear are the machines beeping.
If your stay is long enough, you will try to remember what fresh air felt like. You will fail at remembering, but you will keep trying (if the doctors notice, I strongly suggest they diagnose you as obsessive).
- This article was written with the help of my beautiful friend Sarah Meiseles!
