As my first year of college draws to a close, it astounds me the ways I've grown and what I've learned. The fact of the matter is that no matter how many people you talk to about college, there really is no way to prepare because everyone has a different experience. Nevertheless, here are a few things I wish someone had told me before I started on this journey.
1. Everyone questions their college decision first semester.
Nothing will ever terrify me quite like the feeling I got about one month into the first semester that maybe I had made the wrong decision. For as long as I could remember, Clemson was my dream school. All of the sudden, though, I was overwhelmed, missing home, and struggling to make friends. I began to think very seriously about transferring after my first year, and I even brought up to my parents how unhappy I felt. After spending an entire month at home for Christmas, however, I came back to Clemson with a new perspective. I began making more friends, took less credit hours, and cut some negative people out of my life. After making these changes, Clemson felt like home, and I now can’t imagine being anywhere else. The past few weeks I’ve learned, from multiple people, that most everyone feels this way their first semester due to the massive change that comes with beginning college.
2. You do not have to be friends with anyone you don't want to be.
This was a hard one for me to learn because in high school, anyone you decided to cut out of your life was always in a class with you, or you’d most likely see them at least twice a day. It’s different in college. If you decide someone is negatively affecting you, you can very easily decide not to see them anymore without the awkward run-ins, and the gossip that would inevitably start spreading about you. With that being said, though, there are still some very immature people out there, so my advice is to guard yourself and be careful who you trust with your life.
3. Attendance is most likely mandatory.
For four years all I heard from my high school teachers was “no one is even going to care if you show up to class in college!!” Usually, that was being yelled at us in an exasperated tone as we left the classroom, unwilling to stay after the bell rang. I’ve found the complete opposite to be true in my first year. Almost every single one of my classes has a maximum number of unexcused absences before you either get dropped from the course or fail. The classes that don’t have an attendance requirement typically have daily participation grades, and after taking the first exam, you realize really fast that you need all the help you can get from a participation grade. With that said, I have had 2 classes where attendance wasn’t mandatory and there wasn’t a daily grade. Both of these were very difficult courses, and if I missed a day, I would have regretted it.
4. You will lose people.
Whether it be a boyfriend, a friend who went to a different school who you swore you would stay in touch with, or sometimes even a friend who came to the same school, you will lose someone. Or, if you’re like me, you might lose all three. Not all of these losses will end with a messy fight or bad blood, though. It’s very natural to grow apart from people and know that while they were a big part of your life at one point, this may not be the case anymore. The one that will hurt the most, though, is the person you meet at school who you think is your friend, and then one day you never hear from them again. It’s happened to everyone I know, and even though it hurts, it’s important to know that there is a plan for your life- one that doesn’t involve that person.
5. It is a lot more work than people let on.
Coming out of one of the hardest high schools in my state, all I heard my senior year from friends who had graduated was that “college is so much less work,” and “it’s not as bad as Providence.” I let those words carry me through my final year of high school, excited about the ease I would be able to take on college with. I was led astray, however. It took me about two weeks to realize that college was way more work than high school, I just had a lot more time to do it. Instead of spending 7 hours a day in class and then 3 hours doing extracurricular activities, I was spending maybe 4 hours in class and 2 doing other activities. This gave me extra time during the day to do homework and study that I never had in high school, so it makes it feel like it’s less work when in reality it isn’t.
6. It is okay to go out on a school night.
Along with a brand new education, college brings a lot more freedom. It’s your decision to do what you wish with it, and my second semester, I decided to be a lot more social. This one decision changed my whole life experience. I was so much more motivated to get my work done and to pay attention in class because I knew if I did, I could reward myself by going out with my friends that night. I firmly believe if you want to get everything out of college that you can, it is important to try everything thrown at you.
