I absolutely love kids, which is good because I work at a daycare. One of my favorite things about working kids is that you never know what they are going to say or do. There are new surprises every day. Here are a few of the funniest, weirdest, and most random things I've heard out of a 3-year-olds mouth:
1."You're just a kid."
2. "Why doesn't she have a penis?"
Diaper changing is one of the many joys of being a daycare employee. As I was changing a sweet little girls diaper one day, one of the boys was walking into the restroom to go potty. As he passed by me changing the girl's diaper, he noticed something was not quite right. He stopped and with sincere concern asked,"Why doesn't she have a penis?" I explained that it was because she was a girl, which prompted his next question: "What does she have then?" I quickly suggested that he should ask his parents about that. He did.
3."I don't need to wash my hands because I didn't touch my penis."
This one is pretty self-explanatory. He made a very compelling argument. This was the same boy who asked the previous question.
4."I worry about you."
I've been working at the daycare a little over a year now, so all of the kids I started out with have moved up to the next class. One day I was subbing in that class and I was so excited because I would get to see all my favorite kids (as a teacher I officially don't have favorites). I was chatting with one of my old kiddos and I said "I miss all y'all so much," and he replied, with seriousness, sincerity and the utmost concern, "I worry about you." Never in my life did I anticipate a 3-year-old worrying about me. It was heartwarming though, and in a way comforting to know he was thinking of me.
5. "This is not a tractor, this is a bulldozer."
This little boy knows and is adamant about his construction vehicles, as any good American should be. He has this set of shirts that have different vehicles on them and he absolutely loves wearing them. One day he was wearing one and one of his sweet little friends took notice and said to him, "I like your tractor!" The boy snapped his head toward the boy, his face filled with disgust and disbelief. "This is NOT a tractor, this is a BULLDOZER!" He had never been so offended. I don't think I have ever been that offended.
Bonus conversations:
*girls pretending to do my hair and makeup* Me: Am I pretty yet? Little girl: Nope. You have to wear a dress.
Me: what do you want to be when you grow up? Little girl: a unicorn
Me: what's your dad's name? Little boy: Uncle Tyler
kid: *points to a pimple on my face* You got a boo-boo? (this happens literally every day)
