Things that will Inevitably Happen to You in a College Dorm
Entertainment

Things that will Inevitably Happen to You in a College Dorm

Who are you and why are you in my bed?

422
Shayli Kipnis

Moving from the comfort of your suburban town to the chaotic dorms is truly a unique experience that I believe everyone needs to have. Once you wake up on a game day by three boys on your floor handing you a shot at 7:00 a.m., you'll know you've made it. Until then, chances are you'll discover that the typical college scene that movies like Old School depict are exactly what you'll find in a residence hall whether you want to see a ball sack on the daily or not. Despite the musky smell from down the hall, the cramped space, and the sleep deprivation, living in the dorms has provided me with the best stories, memories, and friendships I will ever have. Here are a few:

1. Someone will leave you a passive aggressive post-it note

2. You will sleep on a futon, not by choice

3. There will be one room that always smells questionable

4. Someone will leave you a present in the shower

5. You'll experience a fire drill at the worst moment possible

Unfortunately, you'll probably run into your crush wearing nothing but a towel.

6. You'll be kept up until 3 the night before a midterm

7. You will be sexiled*

*To "exile" one's roommate in order to engage in intimate relations/sexual activity with another

8. Someone will have slept in your bed without permission

9. Someone will take your stuff out of the washing machine and put your undies on display, or just steal your clothes

10. You will get locked out of your room

11. There will always be that one person who doesn't flush

WHO ARE YOU AND WHY ARE YOU THE WORST PERSON?

12. You will hear someone throwing up

And yes, it might be you.

13. You won't know how to discard your empty handles

14. You will get in the elevator when it is going up and you need to go down

Awkward.

15. There will be a game of quidditch happening outside your window

16. You will encounter way too many condom wrappers that aren't even yours

No glove, no love, am I right?

17. Rooms will be covered with photos of high school friends and posters of John Belushi and provocative women

And Christmas lights all year long (no judgements).

18. You'll hear something you don't want to hear through the thin walls

19. You will go at least three days at a time eating leftovers or ramen

20. You will share everything

Clothes, food, virginity, bad stories, anything really.

21. You'll pull an all-nighter to finish (and start) your paper due the following day

22. You won't be able to go anywhere without running into someone you know

23. You will go out instead of doing your homework, because you felt left out watching everyone else have fun

I immediately regret this decision.

24. The residents on your floor will make a big deal when they catch you mid- "walk of shame" home

25. Ultimately, you will create some of your greatest memories and meet some of your best friends

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Swoon

I Started Dating A Guy Before Quarantine, But Now We Rarely Speak Unless I Double-Text

"He's really nice and cute and I like being around him when we see each other, but he's awful at communication."

Each week Swoonie B will give her advice on anonymous topics submitted by readers. Want to Ask Swoonie B something related to dating and relationships? Fill out this form here — it's anonymous.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

This Is Exactly What You Should Eat Today In Quarantine, Based On Your Zodiac Sign

You've probably been eating it the past three months,

If we added up all the minutes of my life I've stood in front of the fridge or pantry mindlessly glazing over options, it would probably amount to several years longer than I'd care to admit.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

If You Don't Think People Are Legitimately Scared To Stay In Lockdown, Think Again

People are terrified of what could happen if states stay in lockdown too long.

Coronavirus (COVID-19) continues to be the topic of discussion for most U.S. residents. From federal reopening guidelines to individual state timelines, the country is all over the place. This sparks conversations within the news, social media, and in family homes about the consequences of reopening the country incorrectly.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

If You Don't Think People Are Legitimately Scared To Reopen States, You're Not Looking Hard Enough

People are terrified of what could happen if states begin reopening too early.

Coronavirus (COVID-19) continues to be the topic of discussion for most U.S. residents. From federal reopening guidelines to individual state timelines, the country is all over the place. This sparks conversations within the news, social media, and in family homes about the consequences of reopening the country incorrectly.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Feel A Lil' Better: Because You Need To Stretch It Out

Your weekly wellness boost from Odyssey.

No matter how good (or bad) you'd describe your health, one thing is for sure: a little boost is ALWAYS a good idea. Whether that's reading a new, motivating book, or listening to a song that speaks to your soul, there are plenty of resources to help your health thrive on any given day.

Flexibility is an important part of life. Yes, you need to be able to go with the flow and adjust when needed, but literal, physical flexibility is equally handy. Not only does increased flexibility keep you safe from injury each time you work out, but a good stretch session is incredibly soothing after a long day. Your body goes through a lot! It needs to cool down and get loose after all the activities you put it through.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

5 Amazing Things That Happened To Me When I Took Just A Week Off From Social Media

I've taken one-week off social media, and here's what I learned.


You’ll think clearer.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments