I was hoping that I would never have a moment like 9/11, where I will never forget where I was. I still remember being in my first-grade classroom. My mom worked at my school and she came into my classroom , I could tell she was holding back tears, and she just hugged me and "I love you." Our class sat in circle time and our teacher tried to explain to us what had happened, but at the time, none of us really knew what was going on. The last thing I remember of that day was going home and watching the news with my parents. A guy who worked in one of the Towers was being interviewed because he just so happened to have overslept that day and was late for work on the best possible day.

Now, I will have similar memories, 15 years later of the attacks in Orlando. It was a Sunday, rainy morning. I was so cozy in bed and I was procrastinating having to move for as long as I possibly could. I was scrolling through my Facebook feed and me first I saw the news about Christina Grimmie. I read a couple stories about it and couldn't believe what I had read, but was so happy this world had someone like her brother to stop the killer from getting any farther.

As if that wasn't bad enough, I got further down my feed and watched a news report about the attacks in Orlando and chills spread up my arms. I jumped out of bed to see if my roommates were awake or had heard the news. We sat in our living room drinking our morning coffee, scrolling through social media, and watching CNN. I almost spit out my coffee when I saw that the death toll was 50. 50 families that can no longer be with their loved ones, 50 young people who will never start a family of their own, and 50 people who were just trying to enjoy their Saturday night.

Then I had a moment similar to what I had on 9/11. A guy was being interviewed who survived the attack. He said that the night was ending and he was going to go to the bathroom, pay his tab, and head home. When he was in the bathroom he heard the shots fired and were able to escape out the front door. That made the chills even bigger. Someone was most defiantly watching over him. Just like the guy on 9/11 who picked a good day to oversleep, he picked a good time to go to the bathroom.

I then had another similar moment where my mom called, just to talk about it and say "I love you." It was in that moment when I realized that they don't win. They committed a serious crime and have affected many but they still don't win. They can't cripple faith. They can't diminish love. And they can't change beliefs.

They are not stronger. Killing people over something you don't believe in is not strength, its cowardice. Strength is learning to accept and love. Hug your loved ones a little tighter and say a prayer for all of those affected and most importantly don't "stoop to their level" as mom would always say. Hold your heads high knowing we still win.