The Truth About Situationships

The Truth About Situationships

It's time to be honest with yourself.
10571
views

How many people do you know that are in an actual relationship? Facebook Official. Titles granted. Mutual agreement on their relationship status. Not many, I would bet. Nowadays, dating is something of the past. I envy our parents generation, when people actually went out and “courted” and pursued their love interest. Nowadays we have all of these new terms to get around saying that we are actually in a relationship with someone. Either you're "chilling," "talking," or "seeing where it goes." People fall for these pseudo-titles and mistake them for real relationships when, in reality, it is a situationship. What is a situationship? Let’s define it.

According to the Single Woman Blog, "A Situationship is a romantic involvement between two people which include, but not limited to, frequent dating, house visits, (potential) parent meeting, (potential) friend sharing, sex...lots of sex, and the catching of feelings by at least one person. However, there are absolutely NO titles established in this union. No rules, no regulations, no responsibility, NO BOUNDARIES!"

Most people in these non-relationships don’t even realize that they are in it. It is very sad, actually. It’s an epidemic and males and females everywhere (mostly females) don’t realize that they are getting played. Here are some telltale signs you are in a situationship.

When people ask about you and your significant others relationship status, you fumble over your words “We aren’t dating but…we aren’t Friends-With-Benefits either...” you never have a solid answer for what you are.

You are living that nocturnal life. You may as well be a vampire. Most of your encounters with your non-significant significant other happen after midnight. Most of the encounters are initiated through text or Snapchat. Never a phone call. None of your encounters end with a sleepover.

There is minimal communication. Your suitemates know more about what you did this past week than your "person" does.

You think about becoming more than whatever it is that you are, but are too afraid to say anything and rationalize to yourself that having something is better than nothing. That is your mantra. Whenever you begin to question anything you think to yourself “At least I get something.”

Any of these sentiments seem familiar? If so, you are in a situationship. Don’t panic. I’m here to help. I am here to tell you the truth about situationships. Being a full-time college student is very stressful and, often, people don’t have time to pursue relationships and so they prefer the laid back obligations of a situationship. Just occasional sex. If that is what you are looking for, go for it. If you don’t want anything serious and can ensure that feelings will not be factored into your decision to have casual sex with someone, then yes, do it. As long as both parties involved know that this will in no way shape or form lead to a committed relationship.

But if this is not what you want and you think that by conforming to this lax affair you will eventually get the relationship you want, you're mistaken. Don’t do it. Don’t go into a situation like that when you know that is not what you want. Don’t trick yourself into thinking that it’ll eventually lead into a relationship. Because, nine times out of 10, it won’t. And then you’ll realize that all you’ve done is waste your time. Time you will never get back, all for someone who doesn’t even treat you the way you want to be treated. If you know what you want in a relationship, don’t settle for anything less. If you want a friends-with-benefits situation, pursue being friend with benefits. If you want real relationship titles, wcw posts, and the whole nine yards, then go after that. Don’t stop until you’ve gotten what you want.

The truth about situationships is that they aren’t for everyone and you can’t enter into one with a mentality that it will eventually involve into something more. You need to just take it for what it is, no hidden stuff. Don’t alter your plans for some girl or guy. Choose yourself every time. It is okay to be selfish; do what you want to do without considering anyone else’s influence or input.

Cover Image Credit: Urban Dictionary

Popular Right Now

I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it

536894
views

Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

Cover Image Credit: wordpress.com

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

15 Thing Only Early 2000's Kids Will Understand

"Get connected for free, with education connection"

806
views

This is it early 2000's babies, a compilation finally made for you. This list is loaded with things that will make you swoon with nostalgia.

1. Not being accepted by the late 90's kids.

Giphy

Contrary to what one may think, late 90's and early 00's kids had the same childhood, but whenever a 00's kid says they remember something on an "only 90's kids will understand" post they are ridiculed.

2. Fortune tellers.

Giphy

Every day in elementary school you would whip one of these bad boys out of your desk, and proceed to tell all of your classmates what lifestyle they were going to live and who they were going to marry.

3.Bunnicula

1.bp.blogspot.com

You could never read this book past 8 o'clock at night out of fear that your beloved pet rabbit would come after you.

4. Silly bands.

upload.wikimedia.org

You vividly remember begging your parents to buy you $10 worth of cheap rubber bands that vaguely resembles the shape of an everyday object.

5. Parachutes.

btckstorage.blob.core.windows.net

The joy and excitement that washed over you whenever you saw the gym teacher pull out the huge rainbow parachute. The adrenaline that pumped through your veins whenever your gym teacher tells you the pull the chute under you and sit to make a huge "fort".

6. Putty Erasers

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/385972630558152185/

You always bought one whenever there was a school store.

7. iPod shuffle.

cdn.pixabay.com

The smallest, least technological iPpd apple has made, made you the coolest kid at the bus stop.

8. "Education Connection"

You knew EVERY wood to the "Education Connection" commercials. Every. Single.Word.

9. " The Naked Brothers Band"

www.youtube.com

The "Naked Brothers Band" had a short run on Nickelodeon and wrote some absolute bangers including, "Crazy Car' and "I Don't Wanna Go To School"

10. Dance Dance Revolution

live.staticflickr.com

This one video game caused so many sibling, friend, and parent rivalries. This is also where you learned all of your super sick dance moves.

11. Tamagotchi

assets.rbl.ms

Going to school with fear of your Tamagotchi dying while you were away was your biggest worry.

12. Gym Scooters

assets.rbl.ms

You, or somebody you know most likely broke or jammed their finger on one of these bad boys, but it was worth it.

13. Scholastic book fairs

c1.staticflickr.com

Begging your parents for money to buy a new book, and then actually spending it on pens, pencils, erasers, and posters.

14.Go-Gurt

assets.rbl.ms

Who knew that putting yogurt in a plastic tube made it taste so much better?

15. Slap Bracelets

media.rbl.ms

Your school probably banned these for being "too dangerous".

Related Content

Facebook Comments